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Alright, Show Me

Alright, Show Me

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This week on The Carbon Footprint:

  • Bad Bunny’s Amazon stream —less concert, more mass pregnancy event. Nine months from now, maternity wards are gonna look like a merch line.
  • Tylenol “causes autism” — which means the Amish either broke the system… or never stood a chance.
  • Americans are having less sex — Netflix and Uber Eats are apparently better birth control than anything at CVS.
  • Millennial dads are more “present” than ever — maybe too present, cause these kids are SOFT
  • A guy managed to knock up a mom and her daughter....
  • Someone fired a firework at another person and one of us can relate.
  • And a man scuba-dived into a restaurant robbery — Ocean’s Eleven, brought to you by Florida.

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