Have you ever caught yourself thinking “What is wrong with them?” when you see challenging behaviour? Whether it’s a teenager shouting in public, a colleague snapping, or a parent glued to their phone while their child cries — we all judge. But what does this habit cost us, and what could happen if we replaced judgment with genuine curiosity? In this solo episode, Andy Baker explores how a trauma-informed, curiosity-driven approach can transform our practice as parents, teachers, and carers.

👉 Learn how stereotypes, confirmation bias, and fundamental attribution errors get in the way of understanding. 👉 Discover why being a better detective rather than a judge helps build trust, empathy, and change. 👉 Walk away with practical tools to rethink the narratives you carry about others — and even about yourself.

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• Targeting the Positive with Behaviours That Challenge

1️⃣ Judgment is a human survival mechanism — but in caregiving, it can become harmful if left unchecked. 2️⃣ Curiosity and trauma-informed thinking help us see the person rather than the behaviour. 3️⃣ Changing the words and labels we use can build empathy, trust, and genuine connection.

00:00 – Introduction: Why this episode might feel uncomfortable 01:44 – Why we judge: the social psychology of stereotypes 04:00 – The costs of labelling and missing the full story 06:00 – Fundamental Attribution Error and confirmation bias explained 08:48 – Halo/Horn effects & dehumanisation in care and education 11:00 – Real-life examples of misunderstood behaviour 12:30 – Moving from “what’s wrong with them?” to “what happened to them?” 13:45 – Practical reframes and curiosity-driven language 14:52 – Reflection: Who have you written off — and what might change if you got curious?

If you are a carer, teacher, parent, or anyone supporting others, this episode will help you challenge automatic judgments and rethink your approach to behaviour. You’ll gain practical, real-world strategies to build empathy, encourage growth, and connect with others on a deeper level.

👉 Instagram: @AbleTraining 👉 LinkedIn: Able Training 👉 TikTok: @AbleToCarePodcast 👉 Website: AbleHub.uk

How can schools go beyond buzzwords and box-ticking exercises to truly support mental health, inclusion, and safeguarding? In this insightful episode of the Able to Care podcast, host Andy Baker talks with Dr. Adam McCartney — educational psychologist and national training lead — about how to build school systems that don’t just function, but truly care.

From shifting away from outcome-obsessed models to embedding psychologically informed, trauma-responsive practices, Adam shares his expertise on transforming education into a genuinely nurturing environment. This is a must-listen for parents, teachers, carers, and education leaders seeking meaningful change in how we support children and young people.

The Able to Care podcast is proudly sponsored by Order your card today

• Dr. Adam McCartney’s website: rmcpsychologicalservices.com

• Connect with Adam on LinkedIn: Dr. Adam McCartney on LinkedIn (search his name directly)

• Andy Baker’s Book: Targeting the Positive with Behaviours That Challenge

1️⃣ Schools need to shift from a focus on outcomes to a focus on wellbeing, belonging, and psychological safety. 2️⃣ Collaborative, reflective practice — including supervision for teachers — is vital for sustainable systems change. 3️⃣ Parents and schools must build trusting, validating partnerships to improve outcomes for children with additional needs.

00:00 — Introduction: Moving beyond box-ticking 00:02 — Meet Dr Adam McCartney and his mission 00:06 — Why education needs a nurturing rethink 00:15 — Breaking down trauma-informed and relational practice 00:27 — The challenge of staff roles, collaboration, and defensiveness 00:39 — Building psychologically informed, restorative systems 00:51 — Parental partnerships and advocating for change 00:53 — Final reflections and how to connect with Dr Adam

✅ Gain actionable insights on transforming schools beyond buzzwords ✅ Learn practical strategies for trauma-responsive, relational, and psychologically informed systems ✅ Hear a national expert’s take on the future of safeguarding, mental health, and inclusion ✅ Feel inspired to advocate for change in your school, community, or caregiving role

If you’re a teacher, parent, carer, or education leader, this episode will challenge you to think bigger — and act braver — about supporting our young people.

📲 Instagram: @AbleTraining 📲 LinkedIn: Able Training 📲 TikTok: @AbleToCarePodcast 🌐 Website: AbleHub.uk

Welcome to another solo episode of the Able to Care Podcast, hosted by Andy Baker. In this episode, we challenge the traditional mindset of “consequences” — a word that’s too often just punishment dressed up. Instead, Andy invites parents, carers, and teachers to explore purpose-driven, compassionate approaches to managing behaviour. Backed by restorative practices and neuroscience, this episode breaks down why connection, understanding, and growth matter far more than simply controlling behaviour.

Whether you’re working with children in a school, supporting adults in care, or raising your own family, this episode will give you practical, thought-provoking strategies to replace punishment with positive change.

This episode is proudly sponsored by Order your card today

• Andy’s book Targeting the Positive with Behaviours That Challenge

• Carers Card UK — official site

• More tools, resources and podcast links: abletocarepodcast.co.uk

1️⃣ Consequences are not learning tools — punishment might stop behaviour short-term, but it rarely helps people grow. 2️⃣ Connection before correction — trust and understanding build long-lasting change. 3️⃣ Ask “why” instead of “how to stop” — curiosity helps unlock more positive and adaptive behaviour patterns.

00:00 — The myth of consequences 00:22 — Sponsor: Carers Card UK 01:42 — Purpose over punishment 03:10 — Restorative practices and neuroscience 05:05 — Positive vs negative punishment explained 08:00 — Connect before you correct 10:00 — Final reflections on building trust 13:45 — Like, comment, and share

If you’re a parent, teacher, or carer who wants to move away from outdated, controlling approaches to behaviour, this episode will empower you with research-backed strategies to create positive change. Andy’s insights will challenge how you think about “discipline” and offer a framework to support healthier, happier, and more resilient relationships.

👉 Instagram: @AbleTraining 👉LinkedIn: Able Training 👉 TikTok: @AbleToCarePodcast 👉 Website: AbleHub.uk