#77 The Silent War – The Numb Man cover art

#77 The Silent War – The Numb Man

#77 The Silent War – The Numb Man

Listen for free

View show details

About this listen

 #77 The Silent War – The Numb Man You heard that bell. That means we are in the ring to fight for your marriage. But this round is quieter than most. You're not bleeding. You're not angry. You're not shouting. You're just… tired. Detached. Faded. That is numbness. Numbness is the state between chaos and collapse. It's the absence of emotion disguised as stability. It's when you stop reacting because you've already surrendered. A numb man still shows up for work, still pays bills, still keeps the house in order—but there's no spark left behind his eyes. He's not living. He's maintaining. You stop feeling pain, but you also stop feeling joy. You don't cry, but you also don't laugh. You don't lose your mind, but you've already lost your fire. That's what I want to teach you about today. Because numbness is not a permanent condition. It's a warning light. If you ignore it, it turns to apathy. If you face it, it becomes awakening. And this lesson applies to every man—whether you're leading others, following another, or standing on the sidelines trying to remember who you are. Let's break it down. Point 1: The Leader's Numbness Leaders rarely realize they've gone numb until someone points it out. You've become so focused on holding everything together that you stopped noticing how detached you've become. You keep moving, but you've stopped connecting. You're accomplishing more than ever, but feeling less and less alive. The leader's numbness is built from overexposure—too many responsibilities, too many needs, too many demands, and not enough silence. At first, you call it efficiency. You call it discipline. You call it control. Then one morning you wake up and realize you can't feel anything. When Control Becomes a Cage A leader's numbness begins when control replaces trust. You tell yourself, "If I let go, everything will fall apart." So you hold everything tighter—your emotions, your plans, your people, your wife. You believe control equals safety. But control isolates. You lose connection because you're protecting yourself from disappointment. The strongest men I've met aren't the ones who control everything. They're the ones who have learned to remain open while carrying weight. They feel their pain. They face their fear. And they stay steady anyway. When Performance Becomes a Disguise The next stage of numbness comes through performance. You've mastered looking composed. You've mastered looking calm. But composure has replaced compassion. You've become efficient at pretending you're fine. You say all the right things. You give all the right answers. But the fire that used to fuel you has gone quiet. Your wife can sense it. Your children can feel it. You're there, but you're not present. The cure isn't intensity. It's honesty. You don't need to yell louder or push harder. You need to start telling the truth again. Tell the truth to yourself, to God, and to the people who love you. A leader heals his numbness through confession—by admitting that strength without feeling is weakness in disguise. When Responsibility Turns to Resentment Every leader carries the temptation to believe he's the only one who cares. That belief turns noble duty into quiet bitterness. Resentment says, "I'm doing everything for everyone else, and no one sees me." That voice grows louder each time you ignore your own needs. But leadership is not a punishment—it's a calling. You are not suffering for nothing. You are carrying what others can't, because you were built for it. The cure for resentment is gratitude. Gratitude reopens your heart. It reminds you that leadership is a privilege, not a prison. The leader's silent war against numbness is won by restoring three things: trust, truth, and gratitude. Trust releases control. Truth releases emotion. Gratitude releases joy. That's how you lead with strength and stay human. Point 2: The Follower's Numbness The follower's numbness looks different. It comes from stagnation. You stop feeling because you've stopped growing. You keep doing the same things, in the same way, expecting the same results—and you wonder why everything feels flat. A follower's numbness is a symptom of complacency. When you stop challenging yourself, you stop believing in yourself. When Comfort Becomes Your Cage The first stage of numbness in a follower begins when comfort becomes the highest goal. You want predictability. You want safety. You want calm. But comfort is not peace. Peace is strength under control. Comfort is the absence of pressure. When you stop inviting challenge, you start drifting. Discomfort is what stretches you. Without it, you lose shape. If you're numb, add friction. Choose a task that tests you. Get uncomfortable on purpose. That's how you wake up again. When Distraction Replaces Purpose Followers often use distraction to feel alive. You scroll through success instead of building it. You fill silence with noise because silence feels like confrontation. But ...
No reviews yet
In the spirit of reconciliation, Audible acknowledges the Traditional Custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today.