#59: 当爱变成控制:为什么那么多妈妈“微管理”孩子 | When Love Turns into Control: Why So Many Mothers “Micromanage” Their Children cover art

#59: 当爱变成控制:为什么那么多妈妈“微管理”孩子 | When Love Turns into Control: Why So Many Mothers “Micromanage” Their Children

#59: 当爱变成控制:为什么那么多妈妈“微管理”孩子 | When Love Turns into Control: Why So Many Mothers “Micromanage” Their Children

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欢迎参加2026年的家庭系统排列工作坊:
📩 报名链接:https://hipsy.nl/meeei


在这一集播客中,我想邀请你一起,走近一个很多父母都在经历、却很少被真正理解的主题:
当爱变成控制,为什么那么多妈妈会忍不住“微管理”孩子?

在多年陪伴家庭、尤其是青春期孩子家庭的过程中,我一次又一次地看到:
很多控制,并不是因为父母想要控制,而是因为内心深处的害怕与不安。

在这一集中,我将与你分享:

  • 什么是父母“微管理”,以及它背后真正的心理动因
  • 为什么指责父母,往往无法带来真正的改变
  • 一个重要的转变视角:从评判父母,到理解他们的经历
  • 我作为母亲的真实经历:当爱不自觉地变成控制
  • 为什么真正的改变,始于父母对自己的接纳与慈悲
  • 当母亲开始松开恐惧,孩子如何重新找到力量与方向

这一集,不是教你“怎么做更好的父母”,
而是邀请你,带着更多温柔,回到自己。

因为孩子真正需要的,从来不是完美的父母,
而是更松弛、更自由、更真实的爱

Chapters

00:00 父母微管理的心理根源

05:06 控制与恐惧的关系

09:55 爱的力量与自我接纳

14:47 改变的开始与父母的责任


In this episode, I invite you to slow down and gently explore a question many parents live with, yet rarely feel truly understood in:
When love turns into control — why do so many mothers end up micromanaging their children?

Through years of working with families, especially those with teenagers, I’ve seen again and again that control is often not about power — but about fear.

In this episode, I share:

  • What parental micromanagement really is and where it comes from
  • Why blaming parents rarely leads to real change
  • A shift in perspective: from judging parents to understanding their stories
  • My own experience as a mother whose love once turned into control
  • Why true change begins with self-acceptance and compassion
  • How children regain strength when parents soften their grip

This episode is not about becoming a “better” parent.
It’s an invitation to return to yourself with more gentleness.

Because what children need most is not perfection,
but a freer, more relaxed, and more loving presence.

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