328: Knighted Penguins, Sleep Disorders & IG Ruining Everything | DIYS with Jay Washington
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328: Knighted Penguins, Sleep Disorders & IG Ruining Everything | DIYS with Jay Washington
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This week on Dam Internet, You Scary!, Tahir is joined by comedian, actor, writer, and content creator @MrJayWashington this episode… man. It starts wild and somehow gets wilder.
We cover everything from Instagram ruining society, Pizza Hut nostalgia, knighted penguins, dolphins with boundary issues, a man who sleeps 300 days a year, a nurse who “lightened his workload” the worst way possible, porn logic, relationship hypotheticals, and the most unhinged analogies you’ll hear all week.
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0:00 – Welcome Back + Immediate Chaos
0:51 – Freeballing & Bathroom Podcasting
4:27 – Career Blessings & Christmas Movie
5:05 – Christmas Porn Joke Derailment
6:01 – “Stop One Invention?” → Instagram
8:25 – Food Reviewers & Shucking/Jiving Talk
9:04 – Terry Crews / Fitness Joke
10:33 – Black vs White Porn Titles
10:56 – MAS*H “Spear Chucker Jones” Discovery
12:04 – FACTOR Ad Read
15:20 – Bruce/Caitlyn Transition Joke
16:34 – Instagram’s Evolution to Insanity
18:23 – Twerking Distractions & Discipline
19:27 – Twitter Porn Algorithms
20:35 – Pizza Hut Nostalgia
23:13 – Beaded Curtain Video Store Era
24:05 – Porn Names & Credit Roll Joke
25:26 – Storyline Porn Rant
25:47 – POV Porn… with a Condom
26:16 – “Realistic Porn” Requirements
28:29 – Meta Glasses VR Porn Debate
30:23 – Knighted Penguin Story
31:52 – Brigadier Penguin Explained
32:22 – Dolphins Are Menaces
33:13 – Dolphin Brain Visual
34:01 – Woman in Love with Dolphin Story
35:21 – Woman Who Married a Ferris Wheel
36:29 – IN THE CLOUD Ad Read
39:57 – God Talking at 3AM
40:57 – Negotiating With Noah for Ark Admission
42:22 – Hollywood: Talent vs Value
43:43 – Sugar Baby Logic
45:09 – Sugar Mama Age Limit (83)
46:13 – Slavery Draft Pick Bit
47:18 – German Nurse Who Killed 10 Patients
50:10 – “Lightening the Workload” Breakdown
51:12 – Nursing Home Bed Turnover Reality
53:22 – Uncle Remus vs Harold’s (Chicago Debate)
54:08 – GLD Ad Read
58:42 – Jesus, Mary, Joseph & Theories
1:00:02 – Did Joseph Smash? + Jesus’ Brother James
1:01:18 – Superhead vs Mary Magdalene
1:03:09 – Trailer Park Fight League
1:04:13 – Man Who Sleeps 300 Days a Year
1:05:35 – Could You Care for Someone Like That?
1:06:19 – Partner With No Limbs Hypothetical
1:07:09 – Airline Carry-On Problem
1:08:18 – Box, Packing Peanuts, iPad Playlist
1:09:36 – Playlist for Limbless Bae
1:10:29 – CASH APP Ad Read
1:11:45 – AI Version of Tahir
1:12:20 – Losing Voice & Voice Filters
1:13:14 – Bigfoot Joke + Kids Don’t Watch Dad
1:14:15 – Reverse Cowgirl… Solo Edition
1:15:19 – Dry Jacking vs Lotion Debate
1:16:11 – Jacking Off Using Imagination?!
1:17:05 – Porn Volume vs Neighbors
1:18:32 – Interracial Line Joke
1:18:52 – Hippie’s Editing Hell
1:19:17 – Jay’s Outro + Links
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In the spirit of reconciliation, Audible acknowledges the Traditional Custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today.