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The Tao of Fully Feeling
- Harvesting Forgiveness out of Blame
- Narrated by: Christopher Grove
- Length: 13 hrs and 3 mins
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Publisher's Summary
The price of emotional renunciation is a constant, wasteful expenditure of energy that leaves us depressed and taciturn, imprisoned in the apathy and ennui of the "seen that, been there, done that" syndrome. When we surrender and soften to our feelings, we reconnect with our inborn vitality and with the invaluable instinct and intuition that our feelings naturally carry.
The Tao of Fully Feeling describes the middle ground of emotional aliveness that lies between emotional deadness and emotional explosiveness. It helps us to soften and relax into our feelings without exiling them or enshrining them. It guides us to be emotionally expressive in benign, intimacy-enhancing ways.
The Tao of Fully Feeling teaches us to respond to our painful and potentially disruptive feelings in healthy ways. It illustrates the enriching aspects of the so-called negative emotions and helps us achieve the emotional flexibility whereby sadness easily mellows into solace, anger unfolds into laughter, fear evolves into excitement, jealousy opens up into appreciation, and blame gives way to forgiveness.
The Tao of Fully Feeling refutes the black-and-white notion that blame is never justifiable. It describes safe, nondestructive ways of feeling and expressing blame - ways that ironically enhance our capacity to feel genuine forgiveness.
When we authentically forgive our parents, we know what we are forgiving them for and what specifically was blameworthy about their behavior in the first place. When we forgive before we blame, we risk dragging the full weight of our childhood hurt and anger around forever, like an exhausted backpacker who is too dulled and over-trusting to notice that someone has put a boulder in his/her pack.
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- Catherine
- 17-05-2023
Incredibly wise and empowering
This is a must for anybody struggling with the legacy of abuse, or even those with a harsh inner critic. His goal is to help you reclaim your ability to feel emotions to live a rich inner life, it’s deeply humanist and compassionate and written by a highly skilled and experienced therapist. It’s the real deal. His other book complex ptsd is also amazing and the two complement but don’t repeat each other. Glad I have both and will listen as often as I need to.
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- Anonymous User
- 04-12-2023
Wonderful
I found this book incredibly helpful. It's not an exaggeration to say it was a little bit life-changing. Very affirming and so helpful for anybody who has historically been shamed out of properly feeling their emotions.
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- Anonymous User
- 26-03-2021
so important for the adult child survivor
Pete's in-depth review of childhood trauma, how to survive it and then thrive, is invaluable.
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- Elizabeth M.
- 11-10-2022
Do not miss this book. The Tao of Fully Feeling truly serves those who suffered and can now heal.
An outstanding book on the terrible impacts of childhood trauma. From one who really knows. He provides the knowledge and understanding to heal. A superb contribution to those who have suffered and missed out on what might have been happy and playful years…a solid foundation for the years ahead.
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- Leila
- 19-09-2022
A must for all CPTSD survivors
Also a must " Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving" by the same author, Pete Walker and "The Body Keeps the Score
Mind, Brain and Body in the Transformation of Trauma" by Bessel A. van der Kolk
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- Anonymous User
- 08-02-2024
Five Stars for Content
This book is very, very helpful, but the narration is somewhat clinical - especially given the content focuses on feeling.
Thank you for this insightful work!
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- Z X
- 15-08-2022
It's changing my life, I think
I came to this book after the author's 2013 book about cPTSD. For me this book is harder to work through because it's much more thought-provoking. It truly brings me on a journey to facing the pain I didn't realise I had all these years and it encourages me to internalise strategies to battle the intrusive thinking that has been bothering me.
I'm half way through the book when writing this review. Although my gp and psychiatrist are very helpful in identifying some of the issues causing me troubles (major depression, addiction, adult ADD, childhood trauma, bpd-like thinking), this book allows me to take time to address the problems on a deeper level medications can't reach. My goal is to one day become medication independent and build a stronger/flexible mind. I'm very optimistic that this book is going to help me achieve it.
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- Matthew
- 09-11-2021
Fantastic Insights
The shame and blame game is important lesson to learn. Without it, you get pushed around and feel guilty for the actions of others. Being able to say "No", and not be disrespected is paramount to maintaining healthy boundaries.
The narration by Christopher Grove is top notch. It shows that this something he really cares about 👍.
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- Cherie
- 16-05-2020
Life changing
I’ve listened to this book twice and will probably listen to it again. It makes a lot of sense and provides answers to questions I’ve had for a long time.
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- Adrian
- 16-04-2024
Lots of ‘A-Ha’ Moments
Such a beautifully written and enlightening book by an incredibly knowledgeable and experienced psychotherapist. I gained many insights, learned so much more about myself, loved the quotes at the beginning of each chapter, and will be recommending this book to friends and family.
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