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The Dance of Connection
- Narrated by: Harriet Lerner
- Length: 4 hrs and 38 mins
- Categories: Relationships, Parenting & Personal Development, Personal Development
Non-member price: $23.82
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The Dance of Intimacy
- A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships
- By: Harriet Lerner Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Harriet Lerner
- Length: 2 hrs and 52 mins
- Abridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 17
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 12
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 10
The Dance of Intimacy takes a careful look at relationships where intimacy is most challenged by too much emotional distance, too much intensity, or simply too much pain. In clear, direct, and dramatic terms, Dr. Lerner illustrates how we can move differently in these relationships, be they with a distant or unfaithful spouse, a depressed sister, a difficult mother, an alcoholic father, an uncommitted lover, a dying parent, or an estranged family member.
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3 out of 5 stars
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dated
- By James on 25-05-2016
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The Dance of Anger
- A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships
- By: Harriet Lerner
- Narrated by: Barbara Caruso
- Length: 6 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 80
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 68
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Story5 out of 5 stars 67
"Anger is a signal and one worth listening to," writes Dr. Harriet Lerner in her renowned classic that has transformed the lives of millions. While anger deserves our attention and respect, women still learn to silence our anger, to deny it entirely, or to vent it in a way that leaves us feeling helpless and powerless. In this engaging and eminently wise book, Dr. Lerner teaches both women and men to identify the true sources of anger and to use it as a powerful vehicle for creating lasting change.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Good info narrator not so Much
- By Catherine on 13-04-2017
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Why Won't You Apologize?
- Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts
- By: Harriet Lerner PhD
- Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell
- Length: 4 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 42
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 31
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Story5 out of 5 stars 30
Renowned psychologist and best-selling author of The Dance of Anger sheds new light on the two most important words in the English language - I'm sorry - and offers a unique perspective on the challenge of healing broken connections and restoring trust.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Life changing
- By Anonymous User on 29-05-2020
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Fear and Other Uninvited Guests
- Tackling the Anxiety, Fear, and Shame That Keeps Us from Optimal Living
- By: Harriet Lerner, Ph.D
- Narrated by: Harriet Lerner
- Length: 3 hrs and 44 mins
- Abridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 9
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 9
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Story5 out of 5 stars 9
Unhappiness, says best-selling author Harriet Lerner, is fueled by three key emotions: anxiety, fear, and shame. They are the uninvited guests in our lives. When tragedy or hardship hit, they may become our constant companions.
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Harriet Lerner on Mothers and Daughters
- Breaking the Patterns That Keep You Stuck
- By: Harriet Lerner PhD
- Narrated by: Harriet Lerner PhD
- Length: 1 hr and 28 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 8
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 6
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Story4 out of 5 stars 6
Before a woman is anything else, she is a daughter. Her relationship with her mother anchors every other relationship in her life. Yet as an adult she may still blame her mother, try to change her, or fail to speak out about issues that matter. Harriet Lerner on Mothers and Daughters is a personal conversation for every woman who seeks to better understand the mystery of the mother-daughter bond.
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The Mother Dance
- How Children Change Your Life
- By: Harriet Lerner
- Narrated by: Suzanne Toren
- Length: 9 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 6
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 5
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Story5 out of 5 stars 5
Written from her dual perspective as a psychologist and a mother, Lerner brings us deeply personal tales that run the gamut from the hilarious to the heart-wrenching. From birth or adoption to the empty nest, The Mother Dance teaches the basic lessons of motherhood: that we are not in control of what happens to our children, that most of what we worry about doesn't happen, and that our children will love us with all our imperfections if we can do the same for them.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Candid take on motherhood
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The Dance of Intimacy
- A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships
- By: Harriet Lerner Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Harriet Lerner
- Length: 2 hrs and 52 mins
- Abridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 17
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 12
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 10
The Dance of Intimacy takes a careful look at relationships where intimacy is most challenged by too much emotional distance, too much intensity, or simply too much pain. In clear, direct, and dramatic terms, Dr. Lerner illustrates how we can move differently in these relationships, be they with a distant or unfaithful spouse, a depressed sister, a difficult mother, an alcoholic father, an uncommitted lover, a dying parent, or an estranged family member.
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
dated
- By James on 25-05-2016
-
The Dance of Anger
- A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships
- By: Harriet Lerner
- Narrated by: Barbara Caruso
- Length: 6 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 80
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 68
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 67
"Anger is a signal and one worth listening to," writes Dr. Harriet Lerner in her renowned classic that has transformed the lives of millions. While anger deserves our attention and respect, women still learn to silence our anger, to deny it entirely, or to vent it in a way that leaves us feeling helpless and powerless. In this engaging and eminently wise book, Dr. Lerner teaches both women and men to identify the true sources of anger and to use it as a powerful vehicle for creating lasting change.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Good info narrator not so Much
- By Catherine on 13-04-2017
-
Why Won't You Apologize?
- Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts
- By: Harriet Lerner PhD
- Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell
- Length: 4 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 42
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 31
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Story5 out of 5 stars 30
Renowned psychologist and best-selling author of The Dance of Anger sheds new light on the two most important words in the English language - I'm sorry - and offers a unique perspective on the challenge of healing broken connections and restoring trust.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Life changing
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Fear and Other Uninvited Guests
- Tackling the Anxiety, Fear, and Shame That Keeps Us from Optimal Living
- By: Harriet Lerner, Ph.D
- Narrated by: Harriet Lerner
- Length: 3 hrs and 44 mins
- Abridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 9
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 9
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Story5 out of 5 stars 9
Unhappiness, says best-selling author Harriet Lerner, is fueled by three key emotions: anxiety, fear, and shame. They are the uninvited guests in our lives. When tragedy or hardship hit, they may become our constant companions.
-
Harriet Lerner on Mothers and Daughters
- Breaking the Patterns That Keep You Stuck
- By: Harriet Lerner PhD
- Narrated by: Harriet Lerner PhD
- Length: 1 hr and 28 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 8
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 6
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 6
Before a woman is anything else, she is a daughter. Her relationship with her mother anchors every other relationship in her life. Yet as an adult she may still blame her mother, try to change her, or fail to speak out about issues that matter. Harriet Lerner on Mothers and Daughters is a personal conversation for every woman who seeks to better understand the mystery of the mother-daughter bond.
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The Mother Dance
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- By: Harriet Lerner
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- Length: 9 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 6
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 5
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Story5 out of 5 stars 5
Written from her dual perspective as a psychologist and a mother, Lerner brings us deeply personal tales that run the gamut from the hilarious to the heart-wrenching. From birth or adoption to the empty nest, The Mother Dance teaches the basic lessons of motherhood: that we are not in control of what happens to our children, that most of what we worry about doesn't happen, and that our children will love us with all our imperfections if we can do the same for them.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 5
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 5
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When The Dance of Deception was published, Lerner discovered that women were not eager to identify with the subject. "Well, I don't do deception" was a common response. We all "do deception", often with the intention to protect ourselves and the relationships we depend on. The Dance of Deception unravels the ways (and whys) that women show the false and hide the real - even to our own selves. We see how relationships are affected by lying and faking, by silence and pretending and by brave - but misguided - efforts to tell the truth.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Tedious
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A practical and transformative 5-step strategy to ensure the emotional well-being of yourself and your child. The mental well-being of children and adults is shockingly poor. Marc Brackett, author of Permission to Feel, knows why and what we can do. Brackett is a professor in Yale University's Child Study Center, and in his 25 years as an emotion scientist, he has developed a remarkably effective plan to improve the lives of children and adults - a blueprint for understanding our emotions and using them wisely so that they help, rather than hinder, our success and well-being.
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5 out of 5 stars
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good 😊
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 3
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 3
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Story5 out of 5 stars 2
When Harriet Lerner began work on her book The Dance of Anger at the Menninger Clinic nearly 30 years ago, there were no books on this subject. Today it is a classic in the field. Now with the audio learning program Harriet Lerner on Anger, this distinguished psychologist shows how women can reclaim this emotion as a vital, life-changing force. Our culture encourages and even rewards aggressive men, yet when a woman shows anger, she is shunned, devalued, and ridiculed.
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The gap between what it's really like to be a woman and what people expect women to be is a primary cause of burnout, because we exhaust ourselves trying to close the space between the two. How can you 'love your body' when everything around you tells you you're inadequate? How do you 'lean in' at work when you're already giving 110 percent and aren't recognized for it? How can you live happily and healthily in a world that is constantly telling you you're too fat, too needy, too noisy and too selfish?
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5 out of 5 stars
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5 out of 5 stars
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Loved this book. I'd recommend to perfectionists.
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For many years, Glennon Doyle denied her discontent. Then, while speaking at a conference, she looked at a woman across the room and fell instantly in love. Three words flooded her mind: There. She. Is. At first, Glennon assumed these words came to her from on high but soon she realised they had come to her from within. This was the voice she had buried beneath decades of numbing addictions and social conditioning. Glennon decided to let go of the world’s expectations of her and reclaim her true untamed self.
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Abby Wambach became a champion because of her incredible talent as a football player. She became an icon because of her remarkable wisdom as a leader. As the cocaptain of the 2015 Women's World Cup Champion Team, she created a culture not just of excellence but of honour, commitment, resilience, and sisterhood. She helped transform a group of individual women into one of the most successful, powerful and united Wolfpacks of all time.
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5 out of 5 stars
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The new rules women need
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 402
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What does it take to be secure in our sense of belonging and self-worth? We may hustle to attain this security through achievements, meeting expectations, or repeating affirmations to ourselves - but Dr. Brené Brown's research has shown there is ultimately one obstacle to our sense of worthiness. “Shame is the barrier,” she teaches, “and building shame resilience is how we overcome it.”
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3 out of 5 stars
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Great on it's own - but similar content
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3 out of 5 stars
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A bit too similar to the authors earlier books
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In this audiobook, Dr Bessel van der Kolk offers a new paradigm for effectively treating traumatic stress. Neither talking nor drug therapies have proven entirely satisfactory. With stories of his own work and those of specialists around the globe, The Body Keeps the Score sheds new light on the routes away from trauma - which lie in the regulation and syncing of body and mind, using sport, drama, yoga, mindfulness, meditation and other routes to equilibrium.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Well worth the credit
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Publisher's Summary
In her most affirming and life-changing book yet, Dr. Harriet Lerner teaches us how to restore love and connection with the people who matter the most. In The Dance of Connection we learn what to say (and not say) when:
- We need an apology, and the person who has harmed us won't apologize or be accountable
- We don't know how to take a conversation to the next level when we feel desperate
- We feel worn down by the other person's criticism, negativity, or irresponsible behavior
- We have been rejected or cut off, and the other person won't show up for the conversation
- We are struggling with staying or leaving, and we don't know our "bottom line"
- We are convinced that we've tried everything, and nothing changes
Filled with compelling personal stories and case examples, Lerner outlines bold new "voice lessons" that show us how to speak with honor and personal integrity, even when the other person behaves badly.
Whether we're dealing with a partner, parent, sister, or best friend, The Dance of Connection teaches us how to navigate our most important relationships with clarity, courage, and joyous conviction.
More from the same
What listeners say about The Dance of Connection
Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 22-08-2018
wonderful wisdom
so inspiring, learning to have deep enduring connections is one of the most difficult and rewarding things we can do in life.
2 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 09-02-2018
Excellent Book
My psychologist recommended I read this book and I’m so glad she did. So much great practical advice and insight- loved it!
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Tanya
- 08-12-2015
Listen at 1.5x speed
I loved Dance of Anger and Brene Brown mentioned this book in one of her talks so I figured it would be a sure win.
The narration is definitely the worst thing about this recording. Even at 1.25 speed its too slow.
The content is good, although it's necessary to sift through the stories for the jewels of wisdom.
Overall, there is some great learning to be had but not the best audiobook I have experienced.
26 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- PharmGirl
- 30-07-2012
Really good, helpful book
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
This is a very good book to help you say what you need to say when you need to say it most... It also helps you realize that saying "nothing" is ok, especially when you need to get anger under control or process what has happened first. Also, just b/c you might want to discuss something doesn't mean the other party is willing to, now or ever, and sometimes we have to deal with that.
What did you like best about this story?
Coping strategies.
What didn’t you like about Harriet Lerner’s performance?
She sounded like she was trying too hard to enunciate each word perfectly and spontaneity and rhythm and emphasis were left out b/c of it. It did not sound natural. Nonetheless, I became accustomed to her style of speaking and gained useful info from the book.
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
No. I think it would be hard to listen to all at once b/c some topics need time to be thought over and digested. It's a self-help book, not a thriller.
Any additional comments?
Overall, I would recommend it. Be patient with the narration. There's good stuff in there.
11 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Caramelslice
- 05-11-2016
Excellent Content! Listen to it 1.25x faster.
What made the experience of listening to The Dance of Connection the most enjoyable?
The book is practical and insightful, with a lot of excellent examples.
What other book might you compare The Dance of Connection to and why?
The dance of anger
Which character – as performed by Harriet Lerner – was your favorite?
All of them. As she mentioned, do not skip any examples. Even you don't have kids, don't skip the example of mother and her child. The same communication principle will help you in other circumstances.
If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?
Let other people worry about their things.
Any additional comments?
I found this book after reading the dance of anger. I was having a lot of relationship issues - with my husband, my in-laws, and my co-workers. This book has provided quite a few excellent examples. I listened to it again and again and have started to apply the same principles in different cases. I have found that letting people deal with their own issues instead of trying to solving the problems for them makes me so much happier and less stressed about my own life.
6 people found this helpful
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
- Donn Edwards
- 11-12-2005
Good and Bad
The content of the book is helpful and informative, but it should not have been read by the author. Her voice is just not suitable for a book of this length. It comes across as dreary and monotonous. I can't put my finger on it exactly.
Perhaps if the author did the reading along with someone else it would help. Unfortunately I fell asleep a few times, which is a pity, because the subject matter is excellent, and I'm sure it reads well in print.
17 people found this helpful
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- C. Kohtz
- 21-07-2018
Slow talker
The book was good, and did give me some new perspectives and also confirmed things I had come to on my own. But Harriet Lerner is a slow talker. I started listening and just thought... This is going to take forever! But, I upped the speed to 1.5x and it seemed normal after that. 🙂
4 people found this helpful
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Syndee
- 10-10-2015
Great book
This was very informative. I learned a lot of techniques for communicating with family and others. Definitely worth the time. I did however have to run it on 1.5x as the narrator read extremely slow! Even with it at this speed there were times it was slow!!
3 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 09-06-2017
Many Gold Nuggets!
You may be looking for the answers to a relationship question you've wanted to ask someone for many years or never got to ask because you've been shut out or have asked and still don't understand the reason you don't have clarity. Harriet brings so much understanding to many of these tricky, complicated and often messy situations that happen in life. Whether you're a young person starting to date or a person going into their 20th year of marriage or you have a dysfunctional family(who doesn't!?!) you will find so many gold nuggets in relationship tools in this book! Read on for enlightenment!
2 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Lara Karam-Rodgers
- 04-08-2020
So helpful
This book had so many helpful passages that I bookmarked. I would recommend this to anyone. The book deals with communicating with family members and difficult conversations you need to have with your loved ones. Definitely worth the listen.
1 person found this helpful
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Overall1 out of 5 stars
- Trishonna
- 04-03-2009
The Dance of Connection
I have the book "The Dance of Anger" and wanted to get the Audio version so I could listen to it in my car. But somehow as I was browsing around I ended up downloading the Dance of Connection instead of the book I wanted... What a disappointment. At the time I bought this audio book the information on it was not informative enough that one could make a clear decision and really know what they were getting...
It seams her audience for this book is for older people struggling to cope and stay connected to loved ones as their health is failing and how spouses should deal with the failing health of the other in a loving supportive way... Not a bad idea for a book and I am sure if this is the kind of book you're looking for that you might be happy with your purchace... But being that I am in my early 30's I had no idea this was the point of the book... Also the author herself is reading the book and after 2 hours of listening to her voice it's about enough to drive someone nuts... She has a very mellow soft voice and speaks very slowly and I found it hard to not get bored... But then again if this is for an older audience it might be perfect. So just be wear of that.. I gave it 1 star because the review at the time I got this audio book wasn't clear enough for me to make a better decision. If I would have known what I was looking at I wouldn't have bought it. Also my low rating is because I wouldn't recommend this book to anyone... I really have a hard time appreciating this book... It seams the author just rambles on and on and there really is no clear direction where she is taking the listener... I hope my review will help someone and save them from buying a book they can't even stand to finish listening to as I have... Thank you..
6 people found this helpful
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Robert M.
- 05-02-2021
good book, didnt like the performance
the reader was monotone and talked very slowly. hard to pay attention but i liked the content of the book and found it helpful.
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Mel
- 07-01-2019
Will listen again and be recommending.
Odd musical interludes at awkward moments but otherwise very valuable.
Harriet has been referenced in much other reading material I follow, but this book was referenced in particular so it is the first of hers that I have read.
I will be listening to this again as I feel more will be picked up each time.
The balance of science and case studies is good and the points well made.
I felt it lacked a little structure and that the beginning and end were a little vague, but the content in general is extremely valuable and I would recommend it to anyone.
2 people found this helpful
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Ms S Walker
- 13-02-2019
Slow narration
Struggled with the very slow narration so ran it at double speed. Enjoyed book tho
1 person found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- www.accentreduction.co.uk
- 28-11-2019
Excellent content but slow and repetitive delivery
Excellent content, relevant and helpful stories, meaningful and actionable strategies but slow and repetitive delivery made it difficult to stay fully engaged. But definitely worth reading/listening.
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It’s always a pleasant surprise to pick up a familiar story and find an unexpected famous friend in the narrator’s booth.
Best Audiobooks of 2020
We've crunched the numbers, heard from our listeners and gotten expert opinions to round up the best listens of 2020.
