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Publisher's Summary

Still struggling from the effects of a narcissistic or psychopathically abusive relationship?

Many people do and sadly there is very little information available to be found online or in the written research, or with counsellors and therapists that can help. Narcissistic Victim Syndrome is not officially recognised, nor is it widely even known.

Even when it is accepted, recognised, and known, not many people seem to know what to do about it to heal it...The fact is being in a relationship with a narcissist over a long period of time has long lasting traumatic effects that can be extremely catastrophic to the person suffering them.

Do the following symptoms sound familiar?

  • Ruined self confidence
  • Doubting yourself and your sanity
  • Mood swings
  • Sleeplessness
  • Extreme weight loss or weight gain
  • Uncharacteristic jealousy/ insecurity
  • Feeling like you don’t know the difference between right and wrong
  • Extreme paranoia (being turned into an obsessive detective)
  • Endless, repetitive obsessive thinking about your ex
  • Constantly trying to find explanations for what has happened
  • Feelings of helplessness and despair
  • A desire to self isolate
  • Feeling desperately misunderstood
  • Overwhelming feelings of loss and grief
  • Extreme bouts of rage
  • An inability to be comfortable with yourself
  • Strange dreams

The list goes on...

Covert Narcissists dangle their vulnerability in front of you as bait, just waiting for your good nurturing mothering/fathering instincts to kick in and rescue the poor little lost child they are presenting to you.

But beneath the mask of a shy, vulnerable and “good person” something far more sinister lurks.

And this what makes covert narcissism so damaging and dangerous: The nature of the disorder is such that you are brainwashed into thinking you are dealing with a human being with a morality, perhaps even a “pillar of the community”.

©2019 Gd Publishing Ltd (P)2020 Gd Publishing Ltd

What listeners say about The Covert Narcissist

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 06-11-2020

The covert narcissist

This is the best book I have ever read on this subject. For the first time I don’t feel like I’m crazy. I have been in a relationship with one of these for 37 yrs. There’s not much left of me at this point but at least now I know I’m not imagining things. It read like I wrote it myself.

6 people found this helpful

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  • 匿名
  • 05-04-2020

This book is exactly what I needed.

I couldn’t have described it better myself. I now can put my finger on it and just being able to define him has helped me tremendously. This book is exactly what I needed.

4 people found this helpful

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  • Anthony Tin
  • 03-04-2020

An uplifting perspective

I was down on myself for becoming entangled with a covert narcissist, believing myself to be dysfunctional and defective in some way. I mean, why else would she have chosen me? Like attracts like right? But this book showed me how false that belief was. I now realise that I am not defective, but actually the opposite. It highlighted what I've always felt deep down about myself. That I am strong, and always have been. Thank you for sharing this important perspective and allowing me to heal.

4 people found this helpful

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  • Paul G. Carter
  • 04-04-2020

Good Book..

Great lists of narc traits translated into the covert variety. You will recognize your narc. More importantly you will recognize the damage done by them, the road to healing, and your own inner beauty. Extremely encouraging and hearable.

2 people found this helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 15-03-2021

BURPING AT THE END OF CHAPTER 7 on Audible

VERY UNPROFESSIONAL. Listening to this book on Audible at the end of chapter 7 there is a brief pause by the reader, followed by a sigh, smacking and a loud belch/burp.
On such a serious topic this is insensitive to the listener and unprofessional. It made me question the seriousness of the author on the topic.
Positives. It was helpful to identify detailed characteristics and relationship traits of covert narcissism. I did however fell there was a heavy emphasis on the “victim” of the narcissist. Without taking into consideration how that person got into the relationship to begin with. We are only prey to narcissism when we understand ourselves and where we came from. Understanding m the signs & manipulation of narcissism is invaluable and this author provides validation to people in these abusive relationships. But it’s also important to identify why we are vulnerable to such relationships and how to set healthy boundaries with everyone. Only then will we not repeat those relationships with someone else.

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  • Debra Bunger
  • 18-02-2021

Excellent summary of CN. Also empowering

Nothing mew here, for those of us who have been studying this toxic disorder, but written and summarized succinctly and effectively. I did not care doe the reader’s voice but that is personal preference. I thought the reader was a bit too dramatic.

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  • Vanessa
  • 16-02-2021

Don’t read this

I feel for the author, sounds like a hard relationship and I’m grateful for their story. My partner and I read this book and were a little co concerned with the labels, tone and conclusions. This is not written by a professional at all. It makes things sounds like facts or truths that are just anecdotal and opinions. It paints the picture that the goal in life is to rid yourself of people who behave like this and cancel them out of your life. The danger in this is it doesn’t require you to look in the mirror yourself and realize many of these things are within both partners. I fear for people to read this and make drastic decisions that impact their relationship and life. I am sure these element within this story are apart of many people’s relationship and they can work together towards healthy patterns. Where I feel this book can be dangerous is that it villianize the covert and says they can not change or grow. Both my partner and I have grown and changed so much in our relationship. We look back and see how our communication had many toxic components to it and we got help, grew and changed. We are both different people because of the to willingness and vulnerably of an honest hard conversations. I do not think this book is helpful and only create confusion for those looking for resources in relationship.

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  • Nell
  • 04-11-2020

Disgusting Belch

The reader belches at the end of Chapter 7 and I was unable to continue.

1 person found this helpful

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  • Tracie Baughman
  • 11-05-2020

PERFECT!!

I have read a couple books that helped understand what type of person I was dealing with, which led me to this one. It explained everything perfectly! I am so excited to have this narrowed down and can officially heal! Thank you!!

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  • Jean R. Lowery
  • 05-04-2020

I clipped so many pieces of this book...

I clipped so many pieces of this book, it actually began to humor me. Thank you! I will recommend this book to hundreds of clients in the future...I’m certain!

1 person found this helpful

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  • Anthony P. Hubert
  • 04-04-2020

Buy this book!

After hearing this book, I felt like a heavy weight had been lifted from my chest. Finally, a book that can alleviate your fears of feeling crazy or misunderstood. Nothing I’ve hear has so accurately nailed it for me.
It’s a must hear for anyone experiencing the devastation of the CN in their lives. It will give you hope where you thought there was none. I appplaud Dr. Theresa J. Covert and I encourage everyone to buy this book!

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 24-01-2021

Thank you

This has got to be the best audio I have listened to about covert narcissist
Anyone been or going through life with a covert must read this.
Thank you so much x

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  • Nelson L. Sousa
  • 04-04-2020

Fantastic book!

Fantastic book! Hit home in so many ways during such a wildly confusing time. I finished the book so quickly and immediately wished there was another book to follow. Theresa can you please write more on the topic?! Trust me this book provides so much and is not lacking. The author is just so great she leaves you wanting more. Very helpful for anyone trying to understand the relationship they are in/has been in. I will be sharing this with my closest friends and family as this abuse is so hard to pinpoint and explain. This does a great job! Thank you, Theresa, truly for the difference the book has made as I continue on this terribly difficult journey.

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  • Betty W. Flowers
  • 04-04-2020

Highly recommend!!

This book was very helpful to me. Highly recommend if you are with a "nice" acting person, but feel confused, exhausted, abused, and end up in circular discussions that make no sense, and blame yourself for being abused by a "super nice guy" love by all.

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  • Betty R. Hall
  • 04-04-2020

More than you can expect!!!!

I’m very thankful for this book!!! Highly recommend, if you’re feeling confused, experiencing things in your life that make no sense. If you are constantly looking for mistakes in place, where they don’t exist or try to eliminate your own common sense and feelings. Please, read!!!! It will help you to find and GET yourself back as it did to me. You are strong! Beautiful! You are good enough!!!

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  • Brian L. Fox
  • 04-04-2020

So very insightful!

This book was spot on! Explains so well the crazy-chaotic marriage I have experienced over the past 20+ years. Its as if the covert narcissist “playbook” was taken directly from the pages of this book. Very helpful hear and enabled me to see the cycle of abuse inflicted by my “Mr nice guy” husband. Highly recommend!

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  • John T. Martinez
  • 04-04-2020

This book is amazing.

This book is amazing. It has really opened my eyes and allowed me to look at a situation I was in from an outside perspective. It has allowed me to see what is truly going on and gave me answers I’ve been seeking for years. It even answered questions I didn’t know I had. It was literally like reading about my relationship word for word. I highly recommend this book!!

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  • William J. Hull
  • 04-04-2020

Very helpful ..

Very helpful for those who have been connected with a covert narcissist!! It refines the concept of a narcissist to fit what many of us have lived with!! It gives you comfort that your situation is real and that you can do something about it.

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  • Kenneth J. Jacobs
  • 04-04-2020

I liked the way the information was presented.

I liked the way the information was presented. It was easy to understand and helpful. Until I read this book I did not
realize the tremendous effect of being married to a person with this personality. It has helped me to see things more
clearly and I am getting free of the manipulation that took place and the destruction of my self worth.

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  • Christopher G. Hooker
  • 04-04-2020

Most informative and impactful

Not all narcissists are easy to spot, and this book nails it - passive aggressive. It was not only informative and validating, but had powerful, life changing suggestions such as: spotting them in the future, managing interactions with them, further reading, getting support, finding a better future for yourself. I highly recommend this book!

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