Being the main character of your own life and building confidence only happens when you have focus. Our focus on the why behind our lives really does matter. Too often we are so busy living life that we never think about why.

We call this survivor mode. A way of life for too many of us

We have to start living with purpose in the face of the busyness of life

Busyness is a distraction and deception for too many of us

We want to escape the survivor mode by focusing our lives and we do that by recognizing some key mental traps that we can get caught up in

Trap #1: Activity = Success

- Everyone is busy today

- Busyness isn’t evil

- Busyness isn’t evil, but busyness isn’t necessarily success either

- The problem comes when we allow ourselves to take on the activity = success mindset

Trap #2: Riding vs Driving

- The reality of the “Victim Mentality” and how it has permeated our society today

- Question “Is life moving you are, or are you moving you”

- Many of us act like we are on a roller coaster instead of driving a car

- **Decide Your Destination**

- **Evaluate Your Every Day**

- The calendar is the greatest mirror of what your priorities really are

- “Desires without discipline will only be dreams”

- Use the Word No

- We have to learn to say no to ourselves first

- Men who can’t control their own appetites can’t control their life

- We have to learn to say no to others

- We have to say no to the urgent and unimportant

- This is simple but not easy

Trap #3: The “One Day” Dream

- Our society pushes and showcases the “one-day” dream

- One day will never happen if we aren’t ready for it

- The lottery mentality - dreaming of how you’ll spend the millions but not doing anything to earn money now

- Are you a good steward of what you have now?

CHALLENGE

- Ask yourself, “Why am I so busy”

- Am I choosing what I do or allowing it to be selected for me?

- Do this in the reality of your life.

- Write out everything you are committed to, and how much time that takes each week, and look at that list. Are you setting yourself up for stress and overcommitment?

- You can’t control everything but what CAN you control

- Start with the little daily decisions

- Are you choosing how you live or just surviving in the little things of everyday life?

- The “one-day” mentality comes from feeling overwhelmed with all the stuff life throws at us

- Do you need all the decisions you have to make?

- Start fixing the small areas and you will build up strength for the big areas

Watch and Enjoy!

David & Reese Maxwell

RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN

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Thriving Man Coaching Resources

4D MODEL FREE PDF

“Action is the currency of a life well lived.”

This truth shows up in our lives every day. We must take action in our lives and not just wish things would change. Without action, there won’t be change and many aspects of life wouldn’t happen. We all must take action if we want to live our lives well.

We are talking on today’s show about building confidence and being the main character of our own lives. To do this, we must make choices and then take action. Choices always precede action and action must follow our choices or we won’t do anything.

This means we must walk in the confidence of making decisions. We can’t live a main character's life if we aren’t willing to make the main character's decisions.

1. A Confident Person Removes the Unnecessary Obstacles

- What are some unnecessary obstacles standing between us and a life of confidence?

- Worry

- The Trivial

- Savior Complex/Perfectionism

- Interesting Distractions

2. A Confident Person Embraces the Important Obstacles

- Choose: Pick the key area you need to grow in the most

- Your growth in one area gives you the strength and belief to tackle other areas

- Move: Be patient, keep moving

- Endure: Expect failures. Don’t take it personally

- Ask: Get coaching and help

CHALLENGE

Courage Starts Now

- Growth is inside out and on the way. It's on the path, not at the end of the path so start moving in a direction

- Avoid Analysis paralysis= walking in mental circles

- Don’t Use Thinking and Planning to Stall Progress

Watch and Enjoy!

David & Reese Maxwell

RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN

========================

Thriving Man Coaching Resources

4D MODEL FREE PDF

FIND OUT ABOUT OUR SPEAKING

Building Your Confidence: Being the Main Character of Your Own Life: Confident People Are Self-Aware

We’ve all had those moments where reality slapped us in the face. Mine was an anniversary picture where I looked like I needed a man bra. It was not a pretty site and it woke me up to reality. My self-awareness had woken up.

We all need to have a healthy dose of self-awareness to grow in our confidence. Being the main character of our lives means taking full responsibility for ourselves and our actions. Without self-awareness, we can't take responsibility and we will always lack true confidence. We will only play pretend based on our faulty logic.

Self-awareness is a big key to confidence and we will look at what it means for us in how we think.

You Don’t Have to Know Everything to Be Confident

- When you study some of the CEOs who are the most successful, you often find they have a strong sense of what they are good at and what they aren’t

- They are willing to say “I don’t know” and let experts do their job

- We often get caught up in ourselves and think we have to be able to have all the answers.

- We all have areas we love and excel in and areas we don’t.

You Don’t Have to Excel at Everything to be Confident

- We all have strengths, and we all have weaknesses

1. Recognize your strengths

2. Acknowledge your weaknesses

You Don’t Have to be Perfect to Be Confident

- There is tremendous pressure for guys to be self-sufficient. To be the full package.

- We can’t do it all. We can’t be it all. outside of Jesus, NO ONE IS THE FULL PACKAGE.

- We don’t have unlimited supplies of energy and stamina

- Resting and relaxing can be something we recharge with and not just run away to

- Productivity is not the purpose of life

CHALLENGE: Self Awareness Comes from Learning, Reflection, and Trustworthy Opinions

Learning

- Objective tools to help you build categories for strengths and weaknesses. (No one tool is perfect, but many are useful.)

- Strengthfinders assessment

- Working Genius Assessments

Reflecting

- Work + Love

- What are you good at and enjoy?

- What are you good at but don’t like it?

Trustworthy Opinions

- Find people you trust to ask them their thoughts

- What do you think I am good at?

- Where are some areas in which I don’t excel?

Watch and Enjoy!

David & Reese Maxwell

RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN

========================

Thriving Man Coaching Resources:

https://www.thrivingman.com/coaching

4D MODEL FREE PDF

Learn about the 4 fundamentals of a Successful Life

https://www.thrivingman.com/the-4d-model

DISCOVER OUR SPEAKING AND HOW WE HAVE EMPOWERED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE ACROSS THE WORLD

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