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  • No More Mr. Nice Guy

  • A Proven Plan for Getting What You Want in Love, Sex and Life (Updated)
  • By: Dr Robert Glover
  • Narrated by: Dr Robert Glover
  • Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
  • 4.7 out of 5 stars (843 ratings)

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No More Mr. Nice Guy

By: Dr Robert Glover
Narrated by: Dr Robert Glover
Free with 30-day trial

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Publisher's Summary

“One of the best books I’ve ever read on men’s emotional health and development.” Mark Manson, author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck and Models.

“I have read every self-help book out there, but this was the first that put everything together in a way that made perfect sense to me.”

“Every page of my copy of No More Mr. Nice Guy is highlighted in yellow. How did you know me so well?

A Nice Guy, according to Dr. Robert Glover, a pioneering expert on the Nice Guy Syndrome, is a man who believes he is not okay just as he is. He is convinced that he must become what he thinks others want him to be liked, loved, and get his needs met. He also believes that he must hide anything about himself that might trigger a negative response in others.

The Nice Guy Syndrome typically begins in infancy and childhood when a young boy inaccurately internalizes emotional messages about himself and the world. It is fueled by toxic shame and anxiety. Rapid social change in the late 20th century and early 21st century has contributed to a worldwide explosion of men struggling to find happiness, love, and purpose.

The paradigm of the Nice Guy Syndrome is driven by three faulty covert contracts. Nice Guys believe:  

  • If I am good, then I will be liked and loved.
  • If I meet other people’s needs without them having to ask, then they will meet my needs without me having to ask.
  • If I do everything right, then I will have a smooth, problem-free life.

The inauthentic and chameleon-like approach to life causes Nice Guys to often feel frustrated, confused, and resentful. Subsequently, these men are often anything but nice. Common Nice Guy patterns include giving to get, difficulty setting boundaries, dishonesty, caretaking, fixing, codependency, people-pleasing, conflict avoidance, passive-aggressiveness, unsatisfying relationships, issues with sexuality, and compulsive masturbation and pornography use.   

Since the publication of No More Mr. Nice Guy in 2003, hundreds of thousands of men worldwide have learned how to release toxic shame, soothe their anxiety, face their fears, connect with men, embrace their passion and purpose, and experience success in work and career. These men have also learned to set boundaries, handle conflict, make their needs a priority, develop satisfying relationships, and experience great sex.

This process of recovery from the Nice Guy Syndrome allows men to move through:  

  • Depression
  • Social anxiety and shyness
  • Codependency
  • Low self-esteem
  • Loneliness and hopelessness
  • Feelings of failure
  • Lack of confidence and purpose
  • Compulsive behaviors and addictions
  • Feeling stuck in life

Contrary to what the title might seem to imply, No More Mr. Nice Guy does not teach men how to be not nice. Dr. Glover shows men how to become what he calls Integrated Males. Becoming integrated does not mean becoming different or better. It means being able to accept all aspects of oneself. An integrated male can embrace everything that makes him unique - his power, his assertiveness, his humor, his courage, and his mission, as well as his fears, his imperfections, his mistakes, his rough edges, and his dark side.

If you are ready to get what you want in love, sex, and life, No More Mr. Nice Guy will show you how.  

©2000, 2003 Robert Glover (P)2017 Recorded Books

What listeners say about No More Mr. Nice Guy

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Absolute Godsend!

I was one of those guys many years ago, 10 yrs in the same job too scared to start my own business. After listening to this I started training in Muay Thai at age 28. It was one of the best things I ever did for myself. My confidence exploded. Left my job, started my own business, married the girl of my dreams.

Sadly once married I slipped back into Nice guy / AFC / Beta guy tendencies. My business failed, marriage failed and here I am almost 10 years later starting over again.

The takeaway is once you break out, don’t stop doing the stuff recommended in this book that got you out. It’s so easy to slip back in.

Go time!!

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11 people found this helpful

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From a woman’s perspective.. from my perspective

I wish that I had had the benefit of listening to the Wisdom of this content. Listening to some parts of the book make me realise how cringeworthy some of my behaviours have been to past partners and raising my son.
I would encourage men and women to listen to this content and glean what is relevant to your life and relationships. It will undoubtedly improve some aspect(s) of your current relationships.
And the best part .. you don’t lose any down time listening to Audible which keeps me on task when driving and undertaking my chores. 💕

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4 people found this helpful

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This man is doing god's work

This book isn't very applicable to me and yet I got so much out of reading it. It's great to know that someone has so perfectly put this information into a format that is accessible and ready to help those that need it.I know hundreds of men in my life that need this book. If you're even slightly unhappy with your work life, your marriage or your love/sex life in general you will surely get something out of this. Even if you don't, you'll simply smile when you realise that there's someone out there helping these men that need it. I have read countless books on similar topics and I think this is the only one that has the chance of being 'mainstream' which is the crucial part of solving this issue. Men and women alike can go through this and take it as a positive thing and nobody need be ashamed of it. Magical work.

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3 people found this helpful

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Highly Recommended

Only wish I had found it sooner.
If you’ve been recommended this book by someone there’s a good reason for it. The information is powerful and life-changing.

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life changing.

I feel like the book was written based on my life. would definitely recommend to other people

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life changing

i stumbled upon this book by sheer accident one morning wheni was the most depressed i'd been in a while. i made one last attempt at trying to understand what my problem was when i heard the title in a random YouTube video. This book had opened my mind, helped me begin sorting out my life, publish a crime-fiction novel i've been working on (Escape: what would you do if you could go back?) and many more things. Not to be dramatic, but this book saved my life. Thank you Robert.

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1 person found this helpful

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breaks you down... helps you to rebuild yourself.

lived up to the expectation. at risk of being another cliche , you relate to it so much you realize you're a walking stereotype and Dr glover aims to help you rebuild a better self once the stark and debilitating truth sets in. well explained. well narrated

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A bit repetitive.

A bit repetitive. Basically pursuing what you want and setting boundaries is good for yourself and your relationship.

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1 person found this helpful

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Life Changing

Initially, I wasn’t sure if this book was for me. If I could get something out of it that would be great, but instead it really hit me with some home truths that will transform my life in all areas

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Thank you.

This book was a well deserved & overdue slip in the face. Thank you so much.

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