My Dark Vanessa cover art

My Dark Vanessa

 Preview
Try Premium Plus free
1 credit a month to buy any audiobook in our entire collection.
Access to thousands of additional audiobooks and Originals from the Plus Catalogue.
Member-only deals & discounts.
Auto-renews at $16.45/mo after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

My Dark Vanessa

By: Kate Elizabeth Russell
Narrated by: Grace Gummer
Try Premium Plus free

Auto-renews at $16.45/mo after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

Buy Now for $26.99

Buy Now for $26.99

About this listen

An instant New York Times and Sunday Times bestseller

SHORTLISTED FOR THE 2021 DYLAN THOMAS AWARD

An era-defining novel about the relationship between a fifteen-year-old girl and her teacher

ALL HE DID WAS FALL IN LOVE WITH ME AND THE WORLD TURNED HIM INTO A MONSTER

Vanessa Wye was fifteen-years-old when she first had sex with her English teacher.

She is now thirty-two and in the storm of allegations against powerful men in 2017, the teacher, Jacob Strane, has just been accused of sexual abuse by another former student.

Vanessa is horrified by this news, because she is quite certain that the relationship she had with Strane wasn't abuse. It was love. She's sure of that.

Forced to rethink her past, to revisit everything that happened, Vanessa has to redefine the great love story of her life – her great sexual awakening – as rape. Now she must deal with the possibility that she might be a victim, and just one of many.

Nuanced, uncomfortable, bold and powerful, My Dark Vanessa goes straight to the heart of some of the most complex issues of our age.

©2020 Kate Elizabeth Russell (P)2019 HarperCollins Publishers Limited Coming of Age Crime Fiction Fiction Genre Fiction Literary Fiction Political Psychological Thriller & Suspense Women's Fiction Scary Tear-jerking Exciting Crime

Critic Reviews

"The book everyone will be talking about." (Louise O'Neill)

"...a package of dynamite." (Stephen King)

"Compulsive. I burned through the first half in such a fever that I lost sleep, I missed meals...a lightning rod." (Washington Post)
All stars
Most relevant
It was interesting to see the aspect of grooming from a victims perspective that is not the norm. Engaging but at the same time many horrible scenes that were hard to stomach.

Great but very dark and depressing

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
A truely confronting book that can be hard to read at times and triggers so many emotions!!

cannot recommend enough!

WOW

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
I couldn’t stop reading the first half of the book. The second half was a little disappointing given how good the first half was. It was both fascinating and frustrating having the narrator defending her abuser so vehemently. It would be a great book to discuss with others as there are so many provocative moments in the tale.
The voice narration was excellent. I hope that she does other audible books in the future.

Thought provoking. Excellent discussion book.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
This is an excellent book and a must read in the time of post-#metoo.

The narrative challenged me and compelled me along.

Highly recommended.

Compelling and challenging

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
NUANCED. UNCOMFORTABLE. POWERFUL. BOLD.
That’s how this book was described. This book is nothing short of that description. We follow Vanessa when she was just 15 years as she is sexually assaulted by Mr Strane - her English teacher. Flash forward 17 years on, we see their story develop and how the trauma has drastically impacted her life. Being sexually harassed or sexually assaulted is something that sticks with you. You start to see the persons face everywhere. Paranoia becomes second nature to you. You’re constantly looking over your shoulder. Vanessa’s story points that out too. A reality for so many of us women. It also highlights the relationship a victim can have with their abuser. And how that can be such a complex and gut wrenching relationship to have. In this book, she comes to terms with the fact that what she thought was the greatest love story ever, turned out to be nothing more than a man taking advantage of younger girls and abusing his power. It’s a sickly world, but nonetheless this is a reality many of us live with. Russell’s stunning debut novel was excellent. Her writing is captivating and I found myself unable to put this book down. This is the kind of book that will make you think about your own experiences from different angels. This is the kind of book that will haunt you and that you’ll catch yourself thinking about years from now. In a time where standing in solidarity with one another and believing sexual assault victims when they become brave enough to tell their story, this book has never been more crucial and vital. A must read for all!

HAUNTING AND NECESSITY

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Beautifully written and expertly narrated, this work will stay with you even if you have no experience of the subject matter. The self examination of the main character is poetic and thoughtful, so much so that I wondered at myself for not doing more deep diving into my own psyche. The time you spend with this work will not be wasted.

Wonderful

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
This was a beautifully written depiction of a terribly sad tale. I completely get why a lot of reviews say this is a controversial story, which makes it even better in my opinion. Starts interesting conversations about important topics.

Heartbreaking Captivating

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
I feel the book hit a crescendo during the middle of the story and even though it was enjoyable I think it would have been better had the timeline be switched around. I won't say anymore to avoid spoilers! great narrator and very well written.

anti climactic

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
This book has changed my life! Eye opening and extremely addicting even when hard to listen at some parts. The narration was perfect.

Wow

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Captivating story, brilliant voice performances, intriguing characters. This book has an important and haunting story to tell.

Wow. A must.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
See more reviews
In the spirit of reconciliation, Audible acknowledges the Traditional Custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today.