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Lingus

Narrated by: Callie Dalton
Length: 10 hrs and 49 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (32 ratings)

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Publisher's Summary

Most people would describe Katherine Berger as a responsible girl with a big heart, a loyal friend who takes care of those close to her, and the possessor of a wicked sense of humor. There was something about her that most people didn't know.

"My name is Kat Berger, and I love porn."

When 25-year-old Kat is dragged to a porn convention by her best friend, she's both embarrassed and nervous. The last thing she ever expects is to meet someone who makes her laugh like no other. This is a story about acceptance and friendship and a love born out of the most unexpected of places.

©2012 Mariana Zapata (P)2016 Tantor

What members say

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars

So disappointed

How can this be the same author who wrote the fabulous Kulti?!

This novel was sweet, with a lot of sex in the second half. Personally, I would have preferred some plot instead. None of the interesting scenarios I imagined that could happen, did. It was boring, cliched and never made me smile, let alone laugh.
I am sorry that I forced myself to finish it, thinking, surely something will save it in the finale? Well, no.

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  • Misty
  • 02-02-2016

Cute little addictive read

I started thinking I needed something to listen to while cleaning and found myself not being able to take my headphones out, so here I am 10 hours later having finished it.

The story line is so unique and interesting. Girl meets boy, girl finds out boy is in porn and then becomes friends with the boy. Can they become more? Add in some funny one liners and comical situations and it's a hit!

I'm very happy to add this to my audible library. Worth the credit no doubt and Callie Dalton does a great job at narration. Her male voice is excellent as well as her female voices to distinguish characters.

23 of 23 people found this review helpful

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  • NEW NAME
  • 29-02-2016

I'm shocked, it was awesome!

I wavered on getting this book even though it came highly recommended. I kept thinking to myself how far into cheesy land can a book go that opens up at a porn convention. It was either going to be really erotic with no plot, or it was going to be a total cheese fest and having me rolling my eyes....instead I got a book that was just simply awesome!

There actually wasn't any heat until about 8 hours into the book, instead you got a stream of thought Sex in the City episode for 10 hours, it was great, it was funny, it was characters I could identify with, and it was a love story of uncertainty with ZERO contrived drama.

Yes, they met at a porn convention, but this was a very well done classic rendition of girl meets boy, girl likes boy, does the boy like me like me, or just like me as a friend like me? There were zany crazy friends thrown into the mix, the gay friend who got officer spanks-a-lot for his birthday, the petite wild child friend whom the world knows as Zoe Star the Porn Star, but the main character Cat just knows as one of her best friends who farts too much!

It was cute, funny, adorable, relatable, with an inner dialogue that would make any author jealous! I want to befriend these characters and I really wish there was a part two, or a Zoe story where we could catch up with these characters again. It was a total escape from reality to read this book, and I will for sure be checking out more by this author!

Great for sale, credit, OR BUY! (Yes, I loved it that much!)

32 of 33 people found this review helpful

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  • Laura
  • 16-02-2016

SEXY, HILARIOUS, MUST READ!!!

Any additional comments?

I have read all of Zapata's books. I didn't think she could best Kulti, but this one did. My plan now is to listen to 100 more audio books so I can forget Lingus and listen to it anew! For fans of Kulti, this book feels like a funnier, sexier reboot. It has the same premise of a friendship that is more but cannot cross over that line. This type of plot really ramps up the sexual tension...your toes begin to curl in anticipation of the moment friends finally become lovers.

Obviously, there is a lot of graphic sex talk in this book, and you must channel your inner Dr. Ruth. Leave your embarrassment at the door or keep walking.

Audible has filed this book underneath fictional humor, but don't be mistaken...it is a full-fledged romance just as every other Zapata book. With that said, this book is captial "H" HILARIOUS. I couldn't stop laughing out loud. There were even some cheesy Star Wars jokes which I recited to my kids. The geek in me definitely appreciated those. The story itself was engaging and addictive.

Finally, as for the narration, Callie Dalton, you are awesome! Five stars perfection. You brought this book to life. One of my favorite reads of 2016. Worth a credit every day of the week and twice on Sundays!

19 of 20 people found this review helpful

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  • Yvonne
  • 19-04-2016

Not for me

Struggled to finish this. Very YA and lacked any depth to the story. Found the narration to be a bit whiny.

6 of 6 people found this review helpful

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  • Trisha Moslin
  • 08-10-2016

Felt very uncomfortable

What disappointed you about Lingus?

I loved Kulti (listened to it 4 times straight!) and I read another comment that said this was a fresher, updated version. I completely disagree. I didn't think the story was as well-developed, there wasn't as much of a reason why the two main characters liked each other. It just seemed like "oh, he's cute, I'm in love with him". One of the reasons I loved Kulti was that Sal seemed like a well-rounded character - she was feisty, had a great circle of friends and family, and was very focused on doing what it takes to be an excellent soccer player. In Lingus, it was like all the characters were just hanging out not doing much, making fart jokes. I couldn't relate and wasn't inspired at all. And I couldn't get past the main male character and other characters being porn stars. It just left a bad taste in my mouth for several days afterwards. I'm baffled about why I listened to the whole thing - I guess I liked Kulti so much that I couldn't believe I didn't like this one so much. Ugh. I'm going to listen to Kulti again...

12 of 13 people found this review helpful

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  • Lor
  • 07-06-2018

Not for me, not romantic, just tasleless jokes.

**** Some Spoilers*****

I got his book as part of my Romance package membership. Let me tell you my two cents, I did not feel this book was romantic at all. After listening to the Wall of Winnipeg and Me, I loved every part of that book so I was very disappointed with this book, Lingus. I felt the book had inappropriate and immature characters, as another reviewer described. The friends would call each other sluts and bitches, then talk about their poop, and how Zoe would take a photo and send them to as the good ones. This is not romantic to me, but gross humor, and in the books the author talks about poop, farts, and burps. The book Thythem, Chord, & Malykhim has the same story talking about poop, farts, and burps.

I honestly could not finish the book after reading 3 chapters. I am happy I did not waist my credit but it’s part of the romance package. I deleted the book due to the lack story and was just plain gross. I gave the book a try because of all the positive reviews on how good the book was. How romantic is it to read about wedgie jokes, poop jokes, slut and whore jokes, gas passing jokes, and falling in love for porn star guys? The characters were oddly disturbing, idiotic, and childish.

This book was poorly written, but the narrator is good. I feel that the Wall of Winnipeg and Me is the best book I listen from this author. The book Lingus is just not for me and the jokes were not funny. I am not a prude, but I want a romance with a story not trash softporn story with nasty jokes. They shouldn’t have labeled it as Romance but another category. Not even the Crossfire Series was this disgusting and raunchy in its writing, this was just constant tasteless jokes.

Según mi opinion:
Obtuve este libro como parte de mi membresía en el paquete Romance. Déjame decirte mi opinión, este libro and lo absoluto es romántico. Después de escuchar el Muro de Winnipeg y yo, me encantó cada parte de ese libro, así que estoy muy decepcionada con este libro, Lingus. Siento que los protagonistas son inapropiados e inmaduros, como lo describió otro crítico. Los amigos se llamaban de malas palabras, luego hablaban sobre su pupu (caca). Esto no es romántico para mí, sino que es un sucio humor, el libro habla de caca, pedos y eructos. El libro Thythem, Chord y Malykhim tiene la misma historia que habla de caca, pedos y eructos.

Honestamente, después de leer 3 capítulos no pude terminar el libro. Estoy feliz de no haber gastado mi crédito, porque fue parte del paquete de romance. No termine el libro debido a la falta de historia, y fue simplemente asqueroso. Quise escuchar el libro debido a todas las críticas positivas que leí sobre el libro. ¿Qué tan romántico es leer sobre chistes de caca, bromas de pornografía, chistes de gas(ventosos), y como la chica se enamorarse del chico que es estrella de pornografía? Los personajes son tan extraños, idiotas e infantiles.

Este libro fue tan mal escrito, pero la narradora es buena. Siento que el Muro de Winnipeg y yo es el mejor libro que he escucho de esta autora. El libro Lingus no es para mí, y las bromas no fueron divertidas. No soy una mojigata, pero quiero leer de una historia con romance, no una historia que no tiene nada de romance con chistes desagradables. No deberían haberlo etiquetado como Romance sino puesto en otra categoría. Ni siquiera la Serie Crossfire era tan repugnante y obscena en sus narrativas, este libro solo tiene bromas insípidas.

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

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  • Holly Helscher
  • 01-09-2016

Weak for Zapata

After having read the Wall of Winnipeg, and loved it, and then Kulti, and loved it, I took a risk with this one in spite of the plot - a porn convention. Unfortunately, Lingus was everything I feared - weak writing, weak character development, immature characters, and inappropriate behaviors that smacked of high school kids.

We have a high powered lawyer in Nicole and a writer in Kat. Both are between 25 and 29 and apparently successful. They have a friend, Zoey, in the porn business who is around the same age. In theory they all love each other as friends. Yet they call one another sluts and bitches. They grab one another's butts, tweak the tender part of "the girls" and basically disparage one another in words and deeds. This is not how adults behave with one another. At least not bright, kind and compassionate ones. So none of the girls had any credibility or depth of integrity for me. The male characters were much better written; and a lot nicer.

The development of this group of kids, because that's all they really are, is non-existent. After the rich development and wholehearted integrity of several other Zapata protagonists in her books, these characters were disappointing. I couldn't have cared less what happened to any of them, especially Nicole who was the rudest of the bunch.

If Zapata wants to manage a difficult topic, which pornography is, then do it with some class and style. Phallic images and sexual comments and motifs were simply unnecessary to move the plot the along. However, there was not much of a plot and the tension between Kat and Tristin was marginal at best.

If a reader enjoys graphic rendition of sex scenes, you'll get a few more in this book than in Kulti and Wall of Winnipeg.

Skip this one. It's drivel.

9 of 10 people found this review helpful

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    2 out of 5 stars
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  • J. Driver
  • 08-05-2017

Looking for Empowerment - just another cat fight

This book wasn’t for you, but who do you think might enjoy it more?

Anyone who doesn't mind women pitted against women and hypocritical attitudes about porn, this is the book for you.

What could Mariana Zapata have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?

There was no need to have women refer to other women as sluts and whores, or men for that matter. She could have played up the main character's vulnerability without having to constantly tell the reader how hot she was. Seriously? Let's have sexy come from the person , the humor, the reality of it all and not just another hot body.

Which character – as performed by Callie Dalton – was your favorite?

I liked her reading style and she did all the characters justice.

If you could play editor, what scene or scenes would you have cut from Lingus?

None really

Any additional comments?

Rewrite this very same story with more self reflection and far less slut shaming all around.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • brittany
  • 11-07-2016

Different!

this was the first book I've read from this author. I'm on the hunt for more. I loved this book! I'm tired of "deep love at first sight" books and this one was perfect! it was funny, hot, and relatable!

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • JNF3
  • 28-06-2016

Laugh, Laugh, Snort!

Both Kat and "Robby" are awkward and funny. Kat is ADD - she does or says what's on her mind and "Robby" finds that endearing. He can be himself around her without worrying about either of his persona's or facades and knows she'll accept him as is. The only problem is he doesn't let her know and it's hard for a girl to live in the friend zone. Good story - I'll listen again. The narrator did a good job on the voices and the story moved smoothly with her character interpretations

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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  • BBBf-sizzlereads-Best Book Boyfriends
  • 30-08-2017

RECOMMENDED ROM COM

My names kat Berger & I love porn.

Love can blossom from the most unexpected places....

A Porn con for example, kat went along with her friend to a porn convention and while she waited for her friend who was in line to get an autograph kat got chatting with someone else who also claimed was waiting for his friend.
Kat and Tristan hit it off right away they laughed, chatted shared lunch all was going great until later she found Tristan at his own booth giving autographs and a sign that said Robbie Lingus.

Kat, I loved her she's easy going, funny, honest, witty and has the most quirky friends.

Tristan is aspiring to be a lawyer but on the side is a porn star, he's charming, attractive, surprisingly shy at times, a perfect BBF, I loved him.

Both Tristan aka Robbie Lingus and Kat become great friends but with his job being what it is Kat pushes her feelings of jealousy and attraction way back and concentrates on being his friend in his limited friend circle.

A slow burn progression from friends to a lovers story.

I loved Lingus there are so many laugh out loud moments, its a brilliant rom com, witty, charming with great characters and oh so hot.

Recommended Rom Com Loved it!

I listened this on audio it was brilliantly narrated and with so many witty comments and one liners I'm sure this would be one of those books that when you re-read or listen you would laugh all over again and pick up on things you may have missed the first time

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 29-10-2018

Tragic

The narration was good. The concept was fine and actually could have made for an interesting tale about public perception of the sex industry and the struggles of making relationships work when one person isn't involved in said industry. Although I didn't necessarily expect the book to delve too deep I didn't expect it to be as vacuous as it was. I also didn't find the book very funny, which is rather problematic when all of the substance has been sacrificed for cheap laughs that don't even land. Admittedly the humour could be a preference thing so definitely listen to the sample to see if it's to your tastes. I'm sure the writer is probably great and has other good reads but this book came across as poorly written, and not very well researched. The characters are ill advised stereotypes that seemed like they were written by someone who has never come into contact with anyone remotely similar to them before and the book itself is dumbed down to filth and repeats the same thoughts and concepts over and over again. Wouldn't recommend.