Get Your Free Audiobook

Listen with a free trial

1 credit a month to use on any title, yours to keep (you’ll use your first credit on this title).
Stream or download thousands of included titles.
Access to exclusive deals and discounts.
$16.45 a month after 30 day trial. Cancel anytime.
Buy Now for $24.37

Buy Now for $24.37

Pay using card ending in
By confirming your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions Of Use and Privacy Notice and authorise Audible to charge your designated credit card or another available credit card on file.

Publisher's Summary

Heroin is a Beast, and that Beast has infiltrated every town and city in America. The Beast has come for your sons and daughters. The Beast is hunting for your fathers and mothers. And that Beast has only one mission, to bury as many Americans as possible.

I Am a Heroin Addict is the story of how Ritchie Farrell survived a ten-bag-a-day heroin habit to become a best-selling author, WGA screenwriter, and recipient of the prestigious du-Pont-Columbia Award for excellence in journalism.

Contains mature themes.

©2017 Ritchie Farrell (P)2018 Tantor

What listeners say about I Am a Heroin Addict

Average Customer Ratings
Overall
  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    2
  • 4 Stars
    0
  • 3 Stars
    0
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0
Performance
  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    1
  • 4 Stars
    0
  • 3 Stars
    0
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0
Story
  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    1
  • 4 Stars
    0
  • 3 Stars
    0
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0

Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

Thoroughly captured my attention. Fascinating

Farrell's attention to detail is commanding.
Fascinating view into the world of heroin addiction.
His post addiction achievements are phenomenal.
Narration was sublime. Cohen's subtlety is a masterwork.

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for dmcstudent
  • dmcstudent
  • 30-10-2018

Well done!

This is by far the best book of an addiction story yet. The story kept me drawn in. The reader was excellent. It was as if the reader was living this story and taking me along day by day. Best book I’ve read in a long time.

12 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    2 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Shanonymous
  • Shanonymous
  • 25-12-2020

No lesson here, despite the preachy tone

If after 30 years, an addict fears to discuss what brought him to such a desolate place, the shame and regret will continue until eventually return to that needle is all he has.

Now, I'm NOT a fan of the 12 steps, but after 3 decades, this guy can't even accept step two. His "humble", preachy advice won't dissuade anyone from trying heroin or relapsing on it. It's clear he is projecting his addiction on the wreckage of his past, and not his present situation and how to move forward - despite Rascal Flats.

His self- blame at "destroying his ex wife" is nothing but self-pity. Obviously, her life and nature/nurture tendency towards alcoholism isn't related to him, and his taking credit for that is the definition of control over someone else's downfall - she would've chosen a partner worth addictive tendencies since that was what she was used to.

Never being treated for sexual deviancy is almost worse than his addiction to heroin. That's why the "program" substitutes a Higher Power for the void od addiction. Otherwise another, sometimes healthy (like obsessively working out), but usually destructive tendencies fills that void again.

I felt ashamed for this man-child, who STILL refuses to face his past, only eluding to its origins. This is a man not comfortable admitting his wrongs, despite the self-pity he expects as a result. Can't recover from the haunting of addiction without step 4 & 5 - even if he's not working a 12- step program (which, despite its difficulty at determining the long term outcome based on the anonymity of relapsers and newcomers, hovers around 6%, based on rehab statistics and even AA statistics - which are a conflict of interest, given the source - and still that is a guess). The closest thing to actually peer-reviewed, replicated, large sample, studies published in reputable journals are there ones referenced in the book "The Sober Truth" by Dr. Lance Dodes, et al who has been treating addicts successfully for over 30 years.

Once an admitted liar, there's no way to take accountability for which memories are accurate, and which are pretend, like his Notre Dame fantasy persona. Nothing in this book is believable - least of all that Ritchie put off overdosing and getting that fix in order to "die with new boots." What a crock. There's no dignity in putting off the needle for something so petty. Additionally, I find it EXTREMELY ironic that Ritchie's story literally parallels the life of AA founder Bill W. - from the white blast of faith and power at Beaver's, through notoriously substituting sexual deviancy and the thrill of cheating despite his love for his wife... interestingly, and not far from the chosen wife's name in the book, Bill W.'s wife's name was Lois. More ironically, Bill W. sought help in Bedford, Mass. - an 18 minute drive from Lowell.

Bonus fact: at arguably EVERY meeting, people smoke cigarettes and drink coffee. (Ah, gotta love "justified" addiction.) Bill W. died of lung disease attributed to years of smoking cigarettes, which ge could not quit - even on his deathbed. How's that for irony? I think a big portion of this book was more lies....

The other concept that's impossible to believe is that his Lowell Irish Catholic father cheered for the Yankees and not the Sox. His dad wouldn't gotten the sh!t kicked out of him, repeatedly for such an offense.

Additionally, his fear of helping Jason get help likely directly contributed to his death. Step 12 - or substitute any successfully recovery plan, suggests - but actually demands - that its imperative to be of service - give away what you've learned. All Ritchie can focus on is himself. Selfish.

Ritchie states that his next book, Recovery Road, which - despite the passing of 3 years, hasn't surfaced; in it, he "guarantees" 11 Steps to staying clean. I can write that book in one sentence - Never pick up again.

I suspect that despite 30 years clean, Ritchie is bound to relapse. I've known addicts to relapse 25, 36, 52 years of recovery. My own sponsors went out after 19 years, 25 years and 15 years, respectively before I ditched that asinine program which insists addiction is a disease and that you're an addict for life, surrounding yourself with the very people, places and things that you're advised against. At some point, you need to admit that if a "disease" has ZERO change in "treatment" since 1937 - when every single other disease on the planet has treatment advances, it's a bunch of B.S. Sure, there's a genetic predisposition - just like there are genetic predispositions towards eye-color, heart disease, BRCA breast cancer genetics and bodily features. It's a crapshoot, but thanks to the benefits of modern science, knowledge of these predispositions should increase the chances of respecting how nurture can trigger nature and avoiding the ones that are dangerous.

My education and career are based on Applied Behavior Analysis. Addiction is a behavioral disorder, not a disease, despite a genetic component - and not nearly in all users. In fact, it's the ONLY "disease" that offers no alternative treatment since it's existence other than AA. They're are very few alternative programs, such as SOS, and only a tiny handful of treatment centers that promise a cure, and are not based on 12 Steps, such as Passages in Malibu. Btw, it costs $200,000 for 30 days, plus add-ons, such as Yoga, massage, Acupuncture, chef-made healthy meals, beach trips, surfing and snorkeling. Ironically, these positive substitutions for a Higher Power - essentially turning yourself into the higher power, fill the void of drugs with a clean, healthy, active way of living.

I find it fitting that Ritchie gained more from his revelations to Dr. Levine than any program - although he's still very damaged. As a disclaimer, I'm not a doctor and don't practice medicine, yet I practice Behaviorism in my career. Thus, my functional analysis based on his (presumably honest) behavior as expressed in this book, Ritchie likely needs lots of therapy, CBT, EMDR and behavior modification to escape his demonic dreams of needless and frogs. I suspect Ritchie has lied, exaggerated or "deliberately memory modified" his take for "maximum" impact.

There are 3 criteria of any behavior. In order:

Antecedent --> Behavior --> Consequence.

The ONLY way to change a behavior, or behavioral pattern is to change the Antecedent or Consequence. As they say, insanity is repeating the sane behavior over and over, and expecting a different result. Properly alter the A or the C, and that is the only way tolead to appropriate behavior modification.

According to Hazeldon - the only rehab tip keep statistics of success rates for just one year, they admit a success rate of 5-10%

Even once an addict or alcoholics recognizes and admits that they're predisposed to the serious conditions, self-care is paramount. It's wondrous that science has provided us with this knowledge. Sure, once hooked on a drug it's hard to stop - I've been there, have the track marks right down to in between my toes to prove it - and I've found that every time I say I'm an addict, alcoholic, junkie and other such labels, I'll continue to believe that. Just let go. You're not a label. Move on and recognize that you're none of these things. You're just another person with a f*ckd up past, and the present moment is all that matters.

My guarantee - don't ever pick up again, and you'll never get high - nor even be an addict/alcoholic/sex fiend/gambler, etc. ever anymore.

Ritchie, get over it. You're no more special than anyone else, and for someone with 30 years clean who can't even discuss the wreckage of your using past without self-pity, is only a moment away from relapse.

7 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Daniel
  • Daniel
  • 09-07-2019

Phenomenal Story

great analogies, phenomenal writing and touching story. I am thrilled to hear his next book.

4 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for colleen white
  • colleen white
  • 19-02-2020

great story

I have 6 years clean. I enjoyed this man's journey . it was enjoyable. I couldn't stop till it finished

2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for nathan martin
  • nathan martin
  • 23-10-2020

accurate

this book was probably one of the best of the listen to in a long timeI was shocked at how descriptive and accurate everything was. I can remember having a lot of the same thoughts getting clean and those feelings reminded me of why I have to stay clean. I'm a grown man 33 years old the ending had me crying!

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for David
  • David
  • 05-08-2020

Have lived with this issue and the Lowell detox

Great way of telling how your life really is being sober for 20 years I thank god every day for that listening to this keeps it fresh and in front of my mind how I am one bad decision away from that life again and having been to the Lowell detox he discusses how the place was it is closed now but I will not be upset that I read this book

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Angela N.
  • Angela N.
  • 08-11-2020

Great read

Was a great read.. didn't realize was just about being in detox for a week. Which was fine because I myself never used detox or rehab..so reading about the experience gave me great perspective on what it is like.

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Harley's Finery
  • Harley's Finery
  • 23-07-2020

Could've Been Better

Ugh the narration in this book...! Literally so melodramatic and whining that listening is a chore. I will try to finish in a few days and add on to this review. If you don't see more written, it's because I couldn't psych myself up enough to listen. Sorry!

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Melissa Maloney
  • Melissa Maloney
  • 05-04-2020

Raw Emotions

Great narration. The author helps the reader understand the true grip that heroin has over an addicts mind. I’m a father of an addict, so this truly hit home for me.
Well done!!

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Jessica R.
  • Jessica R.
  • 29-01-2020

Devastation

Not the story but the epidemic that I know too well from the outside. Watching my ex husband being our entire lives to ruin, to get clean and watch him try and drown me once more even unmarried is devastating. The sea of lies, loss, the never-ending cycle, the stigma that is unfairly given to the family left in ruins behind is unfair. I make no excuses for his choices and I don't hate him, but I will drown in his obvious self- destructive choices. I call her Lady H, the demon spirit he cherishes above all else, he breathes her in and out, she is constantly whispering to him, eventually consuming him like the beautiful mermaid, sirens out to see. He has laughed with, cried with and fought those blinding and deafening demons passed down by his father, n undesirable inheritance when he overdosed, and I unfortunately see the some inheritance being chained to our boys and I do pray, and pry harder. The intro is so defining, the attitudes and he stories very real. The struggle is consuming and you are brave to willing overcome such struggles and move forward to help those you can in a way that you are capable of. If not for the addicts, as an ex-wife, survivor~ barely, I appreciate the canidency as hard as it was to listen to.

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Orla C.
  • Orla C.
  • 13-08-2020

amazing

loved it. Great listen. helps to understand addiction and road to recovery. give it a go.

In the spirit of reconciliation, Audible Australia acknowledges the Traditional Custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today.