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How to Think More About Sex
- The School of Life
- Narrated by: David Thorpe
- Series: The School of Life
- Length: 3 hrs and 21 mins
- Categories: Health & Wellness, Psychology & Mental Health
Non-member price: $10.63
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Publisher's Summary
View your sex life in a different light and learn how it can make you happier. Sex is the most intimately human experience there is. It is can also be the most confusing. Our desire to be together conflicts with our desire to avoid vulnerability and appear ‘normal’, leaving us detached, desensitised or embarrassed. Covering topics including adultery, lust, pornography and impotence, Alain de Botton argues that 21st century sex will always be a balancing act of trust versus risk, and of primal desire versus studied civility. By examining sex from a subjective - rather than scientific - perspective, he uncovers new ideas on how we can achieve that balance.
Pulling back the sheets on modern sexuality, How to Think About Sex offers important and surprising wisdom that proves that being good in bed is really all in your head.
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What listeners say about How to Think More About Sex
Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Luke
- 07-01-2019
A thought provoking listen
Controversial at times, but guaranteed to get anybody to think a little more about the role that sex plays in their life. It certainly could have gone on a little longer (no pun intended!).
1 person found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 06-01-2021
Youtuber Ali Abdaal recommended it! 🤗
Loved it ☺️ It was very therapeutic because of the subject matter. Not at all weird to listen to 🤗
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- Anonymous User
- 21-07-2018
depressing
i personally found his you tube talk to be much better. depressing content, didnt do much for me.
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- melanie
- 07-04-2013
A philosophical & realstic view of marriage & sex
Where does How to Think More About Sex rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?
A great non-fiction read, with real insights for modern life, forcing us to challenge our belief systems and shine a light on some of the topics we might want to avoid, but need to address.
As with the other I have read books by this author, his logical structure and flow is second to none, without being over complicated. He uses everyday language to posit his points of view. I'd characterise it as: modern and useful philosophy for the (probably educated) masses.
What was the most compelling aspect of this narrative?
As a society, we need to think about the viability and place of marriage and sex in our society.
The typical, dry and understated wit of de Botton, makes it easier to review and challenge some steadfast and institutionalised practices and views including marriage, monogamy, fetishes, and the thrill of the chase.
He challenges pure biological views of the way coupling has evolved. As always, he supports his arguments and observations drawing from a wide variety of sources including art, history, and religion through to scientific research and scholarly works, online chat rooms and pornhub.
He takes a compassionate and humorous view of the challenges that spouses face. Perhaps my favourite passage is:
"Fidelity deserves to be considered an achievement and constantly praised, ideally with some medals and the sound of a public gong, rather than discounted as an unremarkable norm, whose undermining by and affair should provoke spousal rage.
A loyal marriage ought at all times to retain within it an awareness of the immense forbearance and generosity that the two parties are mutually showing, in managing not to sleep around, and for that matter, in refraining from killing each other."
What does David Thorpe bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?
David Thorpe reads this with the tone and humour you would expect and hope from the author and the content.
What insight do you think you’ll apply from How to Think More About Sex?
It re-enforces for me the statement that "marriage is not for the faint-hearted". It provides some useful tools and insights as to how we as couples, and as a society, can move forward, being more compassionate, understanding and perhaps a little less judgemental of ourselves and those around us.
Any additional comments?
A useful read for any couple hoping to make it through life together.
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- Timea
- 14-12-2014
An interesting read
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
This book began as a new way to think about sex and its place in our society. I found that stimulating. Nonetheless, there were parts where I found myself wanting to put my head through a wall (see the section on pornography) and felt swamped in Alain's tendency to be an old school traditionalist.
I secretly hoped the book would be a progressive manifesto for reconstructing modern relationships, but proved to be far tamer than that. Alain has some interesting contributions to the debate on modern relationships, but I felt that his work would've benefited from the inclusion of feminist discourse on love and sex. By leaving out the gender-specific issues in relationships, the book felt like a superficial glaze on what is really happening among young couples.
2 people found this helpful
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- Tony C (London)
- 07-12-2014
Interesting.....
Not sure what I was expecting with this -- I like the School of Life series. But a well-written essay about sex that dealt with interesting issues but left no lasting impression.
2 people found this helpful
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- RAUL
- 23-12-2012
Alain knows us
Again Alain identifies an all too well-known subject and with his eyes and mind and words makes us see it in a fresh new way. I guess the stress mark in the title should be placed under the words think and more. I mainly loved the book, though its final chapter did not feel so honest, but rather as something he had to say.
2 people found this helpful
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- Haniamoo
- 18-05-2015
Excellent and thought-provoking
Again using narrative to engage the reader, De Botton successfully throws our understandings of love, sex and marriage into oblivion and invites us to question our behaviour. A fabulous read!
1 person found this helpful
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- Cal
- 26-08-2020
Insights self forgiveness and love for others
A pragmatic take on the manifold of sex and sexuality and the many webs it creates. Through eclectic deferment from history's greatest art, music, philosophy and literature, De Botton enables the observer to adjust their expectations to something more earth bound and rewarding. His words enduce an erotic awe and captivation for the sensual wonders of the human conditon - counjered only by a splendid command of language. Simultaneously, it reads like some kind of modern day spiritual text with a contemporary scientific rigor and discipline.
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- H.M.
- 25-10-2018
Fantastic read.
Exceptional book full of insight and wit. Reading this could actually change your love life.
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- Arlene Finnigan
- 20-07-2017
intriguing
Intriguing (and surprisingly funny) book. A lot of thought-provoking ideas, some of them eyebrow-raising. I think the main conclusion is that you shouldn't have kids. That's what I'm taking from it anyway.
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- Adam
- 20-01-2015
psychobabble for me...
narrative was great and a nice voice to listen to.
book was far too deep for me and I found myself drifting when listening to it.
wasn't for me.
1 person found this helpful
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- SuchGadgets
- 07-01-2018
Interesting thoughts though not helpful
Thoughts on sex but just that. Maybe it will some understand themselves better in regards to their sexual behaviour. I don't understand the title of the book, as it is not really answered within the book itself. The book can at times feel very cynical. I hope the author is wrong, but I fear he might be right.
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- Ingemar Lindgren
- 19-12-2013
I hate the DRMstuff You add!
Would you try another book written by Alain De Botton or narrated by David Thorpe?
Never with DRM on it
What could Alain De Botton have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?
Not use DRM
What didn’t you like about David Thorpe’s performance?
Have not been able to hear it due to DRM
Any additional comments?
Please skip the DRM!!!
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