Regular price: $26.31

Membership details Membership details
  • A 30-day trial plus your first audiobook, free
  • 1 credit/month after trial – good for any book, any price
  • Easy exchanges – love a book or swap it for free
  • Keep your audiobooks, even if you cancel
  • After your trial, Audible is just $16.45/month
OR
In Basket

Publisher's Summary

The trauma and grief of growing up in an alcoholic or addicted family create a lifetime of baggage. If you grew up in an addicted family, the dysfunction that permeated every aspect of your childhood may have seemed "normal", and you may not even realize the level of affect alcohol still has on your adult life - whether or not you drink.

If you are one of the millions of Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACOAs), the cost of your childhood pain can be unbearable. You may have learned how to "survive", but are you "living" your life? Do you fear normal conflict? Do you blame yourself when something goes wrong - even when it isn't your fault? Are you a chaos junkie? Or do you just fear relationships because they are too difficult or too painful?

Having devoted much of their careers to working with ACOAs, therapists Jane Middelton-Moz and Lorie Dwinell now take a deeper look into the origin and cost of childhood pain, as well as the grief resolution process that is integral to recovery. This revised and expanded edition of their groundbreaking 1986 hit After the Tears discusses the latest research and offers insights on living a good life despite a dysfunctional childhood by tackling issues such as intimacy, sibling relationships, codependency, breaking the alcoholic pattern, building a relationship with the inner child, forgiveness, and opening a window to spirituality.

©1986, 2010 Jane Middelton-Moz and Lorie Dwinell (P)2013 Audible, Inc.

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

Overall

  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    4
  • 4 Stars
    1
  • 3 Stars
    1
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0

Performance

  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    3
  • 4 Stars
    0
  • 3 Stars
    1
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0

Story

  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    3
  • 4 Stars
    0
  • 3 Stars
    1
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0
No Reviews are Available
Sort by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Jeffenie Pashmeier
  • 20-07-2016

Very Helpful

This book is like going to fortune teller. It tells you the very personal details of your own life. It's amazing how much we ACOAs have in common.

This book was incredible in helping me to work through my depression, helping me to let go of all of my childhood secrets and know that I can own them and own my story. And tell it to help others.

I Highly recommend this book if you have an alcoholic in your life. <3

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Carina
  • 14-04-2015

A cornerstone

Excellent analysis! This is a must read for adult children of alcoholics. The information provided definitely helped me in my grieving process.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Debra
  • 13-07-2016

Great book!

Thorough, understandable, easy to listen to. She discusses the trauma, how it affects survivors, and how to move forward in good detail with helpful examples. This book could be helpful for anyone new to recovery from trauma or someone who's already been on a journey for awhile.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • gina w george
  • 28-12-2015

Great book!

It helped me identify, understand, and develop personal goals to resolve struggles of ACOA.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    3 out of 5 stars
  • E. Baril
  • 08-04-2015

Disjointed in audible format but good

Disjointed in audible format but good. The narration lacked any distinction when paragraphs or a tabular format was discussed. Still overall it was enlightening

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Rachel
  • 04-06-2018

Very Insightful

This book was everything I needed in my life. Being an adult child of an alcoholic, I have seen how my childhood and growing up has effected my ability to build and maintain relationships with friends and romantic partners. I read this book because I struggle in my relationship with my alcoholic parent, knowing how to communicate effectively with them and others. This book made me feel like I was not alone and also gave me insights on how my siblings and I differ in our coping mechanisms from our childhoods. Definitely worth the read if you grew up in an alcoholic home or you know someone who did.

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Chris Ross
  • 06-02-2018

Enlightening topic

I found the book to be very enlightening when talking about ACOA problems and the life issues many of us go through. I now have a better understanding of some of my own issues and reactions to situations, which will help me improve on my life stability.

Thanks

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • hazel
  • 27-11-2017

Excellent Book

thank you for writing this book it helped me to understand this disease more. I started to go to some meeting Alcoa meetings in the Boston area. Moved to Tennessee and can't find any. I really know this program is thee program for better recovery. Thanks to AA Alton and Codependency I celebrated 36 years of recovery.

Thanks again for this book
Hazel Chapman

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Shirley
  • 08-09-2017

Pain and Longing

I am 63 years old and just beginning to take steps toward admitting I need healing. For me this book touched on many areas that I could realistically relate to. while it includes material which does not apply to me it touches on many realistic events of life that are experienced by children with an alcoholic parent.

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Alondra L. Thompson
  • 06-08-2017

childhood challenges

I loved listening to this book. Self-Discovery is a gift within! Looking forward to purchasing the book.❤

Sort by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • chris
  • 13-11-2014

One of the best books I've read on the topic

Where does After the Tears rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

I've been fof some 6 years in the recovery now and this book still came to me as a "revelation" in many aspects. Thank you for this book.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Weliza
  • 07-01-2018

Wonderful book which I highly recommend

Would you consider the audio edition of After the Tears to be better than the print version?

I have bought both versions, audio and print, because after listening to the beginning chapters I found it so valuable that I wanted to go back and read more slowly. It is a book that has given me so many insights into myself and my life.

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars
  • m
  • 13-12-2016

Thoroughly compelling and life-changing

At first I wasn't sure what to expect. Then I was consumed and finally gripped by this comprehensive and insightful discourse on surviving alcoholism.