16. Developing My Child’s World of Emotions
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About this listen
This week’s shiur comes with a warning: parenting is triggering because it not only exposes our children’s inner world, it exposes ours.
Rav Shlomo Katz and the women of Shirat David continue the conversation about the three garments of the soul—thought, speech, and action— and apply it to a core parenting question: How do we build our child’s world of emotions in a healthy, Torah-aligned way?
We explore what it can look like when a parent is emotionally blocked (chasum), how that can echo through marriage, friendships, and even one’s relationship with Hashem—and why “being frum” is not the same thing as emotional closeness. Along the way, we touch on attachment theory (including Rabbi Yaakov Danishefsky’s Attached), the difference between “open” and “everything goes,” and why chinuch isn’t only about fixing negative emotions—but also about actively building confidence, love, and joy.
Takeaway: Emotional safety isn’t permissiveness. It’s a home where the child can grow and where feelings can be named, held, and guided… without shutting the child down or turning the home into a free-for-all.
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For more Shuirim and Music from Rav Shlomo Katz, visit: https://ravshlomokatz.com
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CHAPTERS
00:00 Sponsorship and Memorial Acknowledgments
01:23 Trigger Warning and Parenting Focus
02:37 Three Garments of the Soul
04:59 Emotional Blockage in Parents
08:29 Childhood Origins of Emotional Closure
11:09 Open vs Closed Emotional States
14:43 Illusion of Spiritual Closeness
16:49 Attachment Theory and the Book “Attached”
21:04 Scope of Emotional Education
48:20 Psychologists vs Parental Duty in Child Development
49:25 Common Questions and Experience of Seasoned Parents
51:32 Beyond Negative Emotions: Building Confidence and Joy
53:37 Love and Joy as Part of Chinuch
55:03 Conclusion and Next Session Plans