"Butt Picking Ballet"
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"Butt Picking Ballet"
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About this listen
Before a tennis player actually hits a serve, they often perform a ritual so complex it looks like they’re trying to summon a rain god or unlock a secret vault. Some players become human dribbling machines, bouncing the ball exactly 17 times—if they stop at 16, they clearly believe the ball will explode. Then there are the "adjusters" who won't toss the ball until they’ve tucked every stray hair, straightened their socks to the millimeter, and performed a very specific tug on their shorts that borders on a wardrobe malfunction. You’ll see players who turn their backs to the net to have a private conversation with the back fence, while others blow on their fingers as if they’re about to defuse a bomb. By the time they finally toss the ball, the opponent has aged three years, and the audience has forgotten which set it is, but to the server, that specific sequence of nose-touching and ball-sniffing is the only thing standing between an ace and a complete existential crisis.