Dallas Sucks, Thanksgiving Rules, & Girls Named Krystal cover art

Dallas Sucks, Thanksgiving Rules, & Girls Named Krystal

Dallas Sucks, Thanksgiving Rules, & Girls Named Krystal

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YO! What's up, youse guys? Cousin Cody’s back in the wooder, and we’re heading into Thanksgiving week with two fuggin' words: Dallas Sucks! Fuggin' listen!

First up, the Birds. It’s Cowboys Week, and the media is inventing drama in the Eagles locker room like they’re trying to win a Pulitzer for fan panic. We are too busy hating Dallas to worry about some manufactured beef. This is the NFC East title on the line.

But this week is also about family, and for us, that means a Thanksgiving full of debauchery that would make your grandmother clutch her soft pretzel. We’re talking about the wildest holiday moments and things we're genuinely grateful for—like girls named Crystal (spelled with a 'C' or a 'K', we're not picky!).

Finally, Philly Mark is in full war-room mode preparing for Black Friday. His mission? Securing a 20-inch flat screen TV for the most sacred place in the house: the baffroom. We analyze the strategy, the sales, and the absolute necessity of being able to watch the Birds while you're on the throne.

It's a jawn full of football hatred, holiday chaos, appreciation, and aggressive consumerism. Grab your Wawa coffee, and fuggin' listen!

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