These letters are often all that get me through week to week. Even if it’s just random stuff, nothing important, they’re important to me. Gramps is great, and I love working on the ranch. But…I’m lonely. I feel disconnected, like I’m no one, like I don’t belong anywhere. Like I’m just here until something else happens. I don’t even know what I want with my future. But your letters, they make me feel connected to something, to someone.
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Ever, I don't know who I am anymore. I'm a castaway. Lost. Drowning. I love you. That's the only true thing I know, and it's all I have to hold on to. I love you. I'll love you forever. Until the day I die, and I'll love you in whatever world comes after this one. I love you so much, Ever. I miss you. Dear Jesus, I miss you. Come back to me. For forever, and after forever, Caden.
Sorry I vanished like I did. I'm not sure I can even explain things. I don't know when I'll be back. If I'll be back. I'm not sure of anything, except that I love you, Ever. You're my twin, my best friend, and leaving you was the hardest thing I've ever done. I know you don't understand. Maybe you never will. I hope you don't, honestly. It would be easier that way. That's cowardly, I'm sure. Cade, take care of her. Love her, the way she deserves. The way you always have, for forever and always.