The trauma and grief of growing up in an alcoholic or addicted family create a lifetime of baggage. If you grew up in an addicted family, the dysfunction that permeated every aspect of your childhood may have seemed "normal", and you may not even realize the level of affect alcohol still has on your adult life - whether or not you drink.
If you are one of the millions of Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACOAs), the cost of your childhood pain can be unbearable. You may have learned how to "survive", but are you "living" your life? Do you fear normal conflict? Do you blame yourself when something goes wrong - even when it isn't your fault? Are you a chaos junkie? Or do you just fear relationships because they are too difficult or too painful?
Having devoted much of their careers to working with ACOAs, therapists Jane Middelton-Moz and Lorie Dwinell now take a deeper look into the origin and cost of childhood pain, as well as the grief resolution process that is integral to recovery. This revised and expanded edition of their groundbreaking 1986 hit After the Tears discusses the latest research and offers insights on living a good life despite a dysfunctional childhood by tackling issues such as intimacy, sibling relationships, codependency, breaking the alcoholic pattern, building a relationship with the inner child, forgiveness, and opening a window to spirituality.
©1986, 2010 Jane Middelton-Moz and Lorie Dwinell (P)2013 Audible, Inc.
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Excellent analysis! This is a must read for adult children of alcoholics. The information provided definitely helped me in my grieving process.
It helped me identify, understand, and develop personal goals to resolve struggles of ACOA.
"Disjointed in audible format but good"
Disjointed in audible format but good. The narration lacked any distinction when paragraphs or a tabular format was discussed. Still overall it was enlightening
"Everyone is messed up"
This book is for those who wish to dive into the depths of despair, and stay in there or therapy the rest of their lives. By its opening definition (adult children of alcoholics and dysfunctional parents), it is for all but the .5% of the human race whose parents were/are walking saints, and tries to sell you on the idea of accepting that you're really messed up. I wouldn't recommend it if you want to actually heal.
This book is like going to fortune teller. It tells you the very personal details of your own life. It's amazing how much we ACOAs have in common.
This book was incredible in helping me to work through my depression, helping me to let go of all of my childhood secrets and know that I can own them and own my story. And tell it to help others.
I Highly recommend this book if you have an alcoholic in your life. <3
Thorough, understandable, easy to listen to. She discusses the trauma, how it affects survivors, and how to move forward in good detail with helpful examples. This book could be helpful for anyone new to recovery from trauma or someone who's already been on a journey for awhile.
"One of the best books I've read on the topic"
I've been fof some 6 years in the recovery now and this book still came to me as a "revelation" in many aspects. Thank you for this book.
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